Welcome to Lost in the Sauce, keeping you caught up on political and legal news that often gets buried in distractions and theater… or a global health crisis.
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Election shenanigans

I put the latest info on Trump's phone call to Raffensperger in this comment.

According to experts, Trump’s conduct has potential criminal exposure:

A federal statute makes it a crime when one “knowingly and willfully … attempts to deprive or defraud the residents of a State of a fair and impartially conducted election process, by … the procurement, casting, or tabulation of ballots that are known by the person to be materially false, fictitious, or fraudulent under the laws of the State in which the election is held.”
A Georgia statute similarly provides that a “person commits the offense of criminal solicitation to commit election fraud in the first degree when, with intent that another person engage in conduct constituting a felony under this article, he or she solicits, requests, commands, importunes, or otherwise attempts to cause the other person to engage in such conduct.”
…The hard part for prosecutors would be proving Trump’s state of mind, because the statutes require proof of knowledge and intent. Prosecutors would have to show that Trump knew that Biden fairly won the election, and Trump was asking for Georgia officials to commit election fraud. And it’s not clear prosecutors could make that case.

At least 12 Republican senators plan to challenge Biden’s Electoral College win on Jan. 6, when Congress is set to officially count the votes. The effort is being led by Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Tex.) and includes Sens. Ron Johnson (R-Wis.), James Lankford (R-Okla.), Steve Daines (R-Mont.), John Kennedy (R-La.), Marsha Blackburn (R-Tenn.), and Mike Braun (R-Ind.), as well as new Senators Cynthia Lummis (R-Wyo.), Roger Marshall (R-Kan.), Bill Hagerty (R-Tenn.), and Tommy Tuberville (R-Ala.). Separately, Sen. Josh Hawley (R-Missouri) is pursuing a similar plan.

"Congress should immediately appoint an Electoral Commission, with full investigatory and fact-finding authority, to conduct an emergency 10-day audit of the election returns in the disputed states. Once completed, individual states would evaluate the Commission’s findings and could convene a special legislative session to certify a change in their vote, if needed," the senators said in a joint statement. “Accordingly, we intend to vote on Jan. 6 to reject the electors from disputed states as not ‘regularly given’ and ‘lawfully certified’ (the statutory requisite), unless and until that emergency 10-day audit is completed."

Their plan is not going to succeed in preventing Biden from taking office, as majorities in both the House and the Senate would need to support a challenge against a state’s electoral votes. For an objection to be made, at least one member of both the House and Senate would need to submit it in writing. Then, the House and Senate separately convene to consider the issue. Debate is limited to two hours for each objection. After debate concludes, the House and Senate vote to uphold the objection and throw out the state’s votes. If the majority of the House AND the majority of the Senate does not uphold the objection, the state’s electoral votes are counted as cast.

• Vice President Mike Pence’s role is simply to preside over the joint session, opening and presenting the certifications from each state. In his absence, the Senate pro-tempore Sen. Chuck Grassley (R-Iowa) will lead the session. At the end of the process, the presiding officer announces who has won the majority of votes for president and vice president.

The most immediate danger from Trump and Cruz’s doomed election gambit is rightwing terrorism and general violence: Trump, in particular, is inciting his supporters to swarm D.C. on Jan. 6. “JANUARY SIXTH, SEE YOU IN DC!” Trump tweeted last week. Four rightwing rallies are scheduled, including one headlined by George Papadopoulos and Roger Stone.
The Proud Boys and other extremists are planning to attend the rallies and may set up an “armed encampment” on the National Mall, according to the Washington Post. On social media platform Parler, the leader of the Proud Boys said that members will be there “incognito” and may “dress in all black” to impersonate leftwing protestors.

Enrique Tarrio: "The ProudBoys will turn out in record numbers on Jan 6th but this time with a twist...We will not be wearing our traditional Black and Yellow. We will be incognito and we will spread across downtown DC in smaller teams."

Rep. Louie Gohmert has more explicitly tried to incite violence, saying the failure of his legal challenge to the election means “you gotta go the streets and be as violent as Antifa and BLM.” (clip)

• At the same time, pro-Trump lawyer Lin Wood suggested that Pence could “face execution by firing squad” for “treason” if he doesn’t go along with the attempt to subvert the election.

Obstructing the transition

Biden’s transition director has accused the Office of Management and Budget of stonewalling the incoming administration’s team. OMB Director Russ Vought is not allowing key staff to meet with the transition team to help prepare the president-elect’s first annual spending plan, a move that could delay major proposals. Vought pushed back on the charges, saying that his agency needs to focus on finalizing the Trump administration’s regulations before the president leaves office.

“OMB leadership’s refusal to fully cooperate impairs our ability to identify opportunities to maximize the relief going out to Americans during the pandemic, and it leaves us in the dark as it relates to Covid-related expenditures and critical gaps,” [Biden transition Exec. Dir. Yohannes] Abraham said.

Earlier last week, Biden himself said Trump officials are not cooperating with his team, singling out the Defense Department for obstructing information on crucial national security issues. “Right now, we just aren’t getting all the information that we need from the outgoing administration in key national security areas. It’s nothing short, in my view, of irresponsibility,” Biden said. The Defense Dept. finally scheduled meetings with the incoming team this week, after not briefing the transition for weeks.

• The timing of the resumption in meetings is notable because it comes after the one year anniversary of the U.S. assassination of Iranian Maj. Gen. Qassem Soleimani on Jan. 3. NATO officials are reportedly worried about the lack of coordination from the Trump administration: "We need the incoming Biden administration to be fully briefed and ready to deal with these very dangerous issues facing NATO's security."

Sabotaging the Biden Administration

U.S. Agency for Global Media CEO Michael Pack is taking steps to keep control of Radio Free Europe and Radio Free Asia during the Biden administration. As chairman of the boards of Radio Free Europe and Asia, Pack and his fellow members have added binding contractual agreements that will make it impossible to remove him or other pro-Trump allies from the board in the next two years.

In other words, although President-elect Joe Biden has already signaled he intends to replace Pack as CEO of the parent agency soon after taking office in January, Pack would maintain a significant degree of control over the networks.

The State Department is likely to designate Cuba as a state sponsor of terrorism “as an 11th hour effort to create hurdles for the incoming Biden administration.” The label, which requires the approval of Secretary of State Mike Pompeo, would undo a major accomplishment of the Obama administration. To take Cuba back off the list, the Biden team would need to conduct a formal review, a process that might take several months.

Such a designation would impose restrictions on US foreign assistance, a ban on defense exports and sales, certain controls over exports and various financial restrictions. It would also result in penalization against any persons and countries engaging in certain trade activities with Cuba.

The Trump administration has been rushing to finalize a myriad of rules before Biden’s inauguration. Since Election Day, the Trump administration has issued about three to four times as many new regulations as it did during other periods of Trump’s presidency. Rules that haven’t been finalized or taken effect can be suspended by an incoming president, which Biden has said he intends to do. By contrast, rules that are finalized can take months, or even years, to undo.

“As a general rule, it takes at least as much process to undo or modify a rule as it does to put the rule in place,” said Jonathan H. Adler, a professor and an administrative law expert at Case Western Reserve University School of Law. “The Trump administration is magnifying that challenge for the Biden administration.”

Trump loyalists are urging the president to stymie Biden’s efforts to rejoin the Paris climate agreement and the Iran nuclear deal. Sens. Ted Cruz and Lindsey Graham are working to get the agreements submitted to the Senate for ratification, requiring a two-thirds vote, with the goal of failure. While such an outcome wouldn’t prevent Biden from rejoining the accords, Cruz and Graham hope it would make their resurrection more problematic.

A vote against them would signal GOP opposition to the world and, they hope, undermine any unilateral action by Biden to rejoin the agreements. One senior congressional aide told RCP that sending them to die in the Senate “would be the final nail in the coffin.”

Further reading: “Biden To Be Saddled With Trump’s Payroll Tax Deferral Mess,” Forbes.
Further reading: Biden will inherit a backlog of tens of thousands of visa requests from the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan — and a bureaucratic tangle that refugee advocates say President Trump ignored or made worse.

Trump money and properties

Manhattan District Attorney Cyrus Vance is employing forensic accounting specialists to examine Trump’s finances and business operations. Vance is looking “for anomalies among a variety of property deals” and trying to determine “whether the president’s company manipulated the value of certain assets to obtain favorable interest rates and tax breaks”.

The analysts hired by Vance probably have already reviewed various bank and mortgage records obtained from Trump’s company as part of the ongoing grand jury investigation, and they could be called on to testify about their findings should the district attorney eventually bring criminal charges

In yet another shady business deal connected to Trump, the United States sold the ambassador’s residence in Israel for more than $67 million. The person who bought the residence is none other than Trump mega-donor Sheldon Adelson. The property only became available due to Trump's controversial decision to relocate the U.S. Embassy from Tel Aviv to contested Jerusalem. Furthermore, State Dept. representatives reportedly lied to Congress about the sale, perhaps to hide that Adelson purposefully overbid.

For now, there is no alternative residence for the ambassador, David Friedman, Trump’s former lawyer, who currently uses a suite at Jerusalem’s King David Hotel or rooms at the former Jerusalem Consulate General when he spends nights in Jerusalem… As a result, the United States appears likely to end up leasing the residence it has owned since 1964 from the GOP-affiliated casino mogul.
“It is very strange that we are now paying Sheldon Adelson,” a congressional aide told The Daily Beast. “It is not above board. We have a number of questions. Did they get two independent appraisals? Was it a sweetheart deal? Was Adelson the highest donor? Was there a reason to sell it now?”

Trump’s businesses have taken in $10.5 million of donor money over the course of his presidency. $8.5 million came from the Trump campaign and related entities that Trump controls directly; $2 million came from other Republican candidates and committees. The biggest beneficiary was Trump’s NYC hotel, taking in $3,039,979 over the four years of his presidency, with $891,003 of that in just the final four months of the campaign.
Trump’s DC hotel is ramping up room prices and requiring a two-night minimum stay for two key events this month, as the president tries to squeeze more profit out of his office. On Jan. 6, when Congress is set to formally count the votes cast by the Electoral College, room rates are listed at over eight times the price of surrounding dates. Trump is encouraging his supporters to attend a protest of Biden’s win on the 6th. A room during the inauguration costs five times the normal rate, at $2,225 per night.
Trump’s Turnberry Resort in Scotland posted a £2.3 million ($3.1 million) loss in 2019, marking the sixth year in a row it has failed to turn a profit under his ownership. Since Trump took over the historic property in 2014, its losses now total nearly £45 million ($61.5 million).

The fact Turnberry remains in the red comes in spite of significant tranches of payments it has received from the US government during Mr Trump’s single term in office… the US Secret Service spent nearly £25,000 to accommodate its agents at the resort during business trips by Mr Trump’s son, Eric, an executive vice-president of the family firm. Since Mr Trump’s election, the property has received close to £300,000 from the Secret Service, US State Department, and US Defence Department

A Florida state lawmaker is calling for Mar-a-Lago to be penalized - and possibly shut down - for flouting coronavirus restrictions during a New Years Eve party. While Trump and the first lady did not attend, son Don Jr., attorney Rudy Giuliani, Rep. Matt Gaetz, and Fox News personality Jeanine Piro were captured on video among the maskless crowd. Guests paid as much as $1,000 for access to the ballroom to be entertained by Vanilla Ice.

State Rep. Omari Hardy: “My constituents are not snowbirds like @DonaldJTrumpJr & @kimguilfoyle. My constituents live here. This is their home, and they're going to have to deal w/ the consequences of a potential super-spreader party at Mar-a-Lago long after Junior & wife leave here on their private jet.”

Are you ready for a Donald J. Trump Airport? According to the Daily Beast, Trump has been asking aides about the process of naming airports after former U.S. presidents.
Further reading: “Jared Kushner’s family real estate business wants to raise at least $100 million in capital through Israel’s bond market… Kushner has helped spearhead a series of moves that have been applauded by the conservative pro-Israel community, including moving the U.S. Embassy to Jerusalem from Tel Aviv and recognizing Israeli sovereignty in disputed areas such as the Golan Heights. Kushner also has close ties to Israel’s prime minister, Benjamin Netanyahu.”

Miscellaneous

The Census Bureau missed it’s end-of-year deadline to produce numbers that determine representation in Congress and the Electoral College for the next decade. The agency is working toward Jan. 9 as an internal target date for completing the current stage of processing records. "If we miss Jan. 9, it's hard to envision that we would get apportionment done before inauguration," a Census employee told NPR.

The final timing of the 2020 census results' release could undermine President Trump's efforts to make an unprecedented change to who is counted in key census numbers before leaving office… If the first census results are not ready until after Trump's term ends on Jan. 20, it would be President-elect Joe Biden, not Trump, who would get control of the numbers, which are ultimately handed off to Congress for certification.

How can you help "Stop the Meal"?

Send an e-mail to: Ms. Sally LangwellSenior Sales ManagerAgua Caliente Casino Resort SpaRancho Mirage, [email protected] Please ask Ms. Langwell to cancel the East Valley Republican Women's Federated Luncheon on Monday, February 1st. Here's a copy of the e-mail a group of us sent to Ms. Langwell on January 13. It may help crystalize and organize your own communication.
____________________
Dear Ms. Langwell:
We are a group of Coachella Valley residents deeply concerned over the current spread of coronavirus in our Valley. As you know, the numbers have shot up since the Christmas holiday season to the point where over 3,000 Riverside County residents are getting infected every day, and scores are dying. Even Covid-free residents are experiencing serious negative impacts, as overwhelmed hospitals cancel elective surgeries and lose resources to handle non-Covid related medical emergencies.
​
Although help is on the horizon, in the form of the Covid vaccines, the inoculation programs are rolling out more slowly than planned, and most epidemiologists are predicting that the worst is still in front of us.
Medical experts agree that a major source of the spread of the virus is large indoor social gatherings, particularly when participants ignore social distancing protocols and the wearing of masks.
Unfortunately, just such a gathering occurred in the Agua Caliente Ballroom on December 16, 2020, when over 100 members of the East Valley Republican Women Federated (hereafter, EVRWF) held their monthly luncheon. The group photo of the event clearly shows the women crowded together, virtually none wearing a mask. So egregious were the group’s violations of the Tribe’s own safety guidelines for indoor events that the President of the EVRWF issued a public apology.
Unfortunately, Covid-19 is no respecter of after-the-fact apologies. The next EVRWF luncheon is scheduled for the Agua Caliente Ballroom on February 1st, 2021, when the pandemic will still be raging. Since the EVRWF is strongly opposed to social protocols and government measures designed to contain the pandemic, it is more than reasonable to assume that the Tribe’s guidelines will be ignored again at the next luncheon.
Our concerns over the danger posed by this event, both to the health of the public and your own employees, are exacerbated by the fact that the featured speaker is Riverside County Sheriff Chad Bianco. Sheriff Bianco is a very high-profile opponent of government-imposed measures to contain and curb coronavirus transmission. Thus, all the ingredients are there for the February luncheon to become a superspreader event.
The EVRWF has already received considerable negative publicity, both on social media and in the press, in conjunction with their December luncheon. This publicity has spilled over to the Tribe, as well.
The clear solution to our health concerns, and to avoid more negative publicity for Agua Caliente and the Tribe, is to simply cancel the event.
We therefore entreat you to bring this matter to the Tribal Council, and ask them to approve the cancellation of the luncheon. The stakes could not be higher.

There will be two games running during July:
Game A: Percy Jackson Hosted by isaacthefan and German_Shepherd_Dog
Game B: BINGO! Hosted by oomps62 and Penultima
You will be elderly.
Your knees will know the second it thinks of raining.
Both of your hips have been replaced and even your artificial hips need new hips.
You're no spring chicken. Maybe an autumn turkey.
You’re happily retired, and with your fully raised kids raising your grandkids, there isn’t much left for you in the house you raised your family. It would be so much better to still have your own private place, but within a larger community filled with other seniors!
Fairview Senior Center is the place for you. A place to make new friends and live a carefree lifestyle. Just see some excerpts from the brochure!

• Enjoy easily navigable paths surrounded by a variety of horticultural features. Sit down on one of the many benches when you need a moment’s rest! Our parks are perfectly maintained by our groundskeeping crew, but if you have an interest in gardening, you can apply for your own raised bed plot to tend to yourself!
• Choose to have meals and snacks in one of our many food options: Fairview Fountain Cafe and Bistro, Garden View Dining Lounge, or make your favorite homemade meals in the Fairview Family Style Kitchen
• Enjoy luxurious personal apartments. Inquire about customization options prior to moving in. Apartments may be furnished, or you can bring your favorite furniture from home. After all, with Fairview Senior Center being your new home, you should be comfortable!
• Join us for our many social gatherings. We keep a full schedule of daily activities from guided exercises to keep you spry, sing-alongs, films at our theater, featuring both classics and new releases, music classes, aquatic aerobics, dance classes in both line and ballroom styles, and competitions on our shaded shuffleboard courts, designed to keep you protected from the sun and rain while still getting fresh air.
• Dive in to new adventures in our library, well-stocked with new bestsellers and familiar classics.
• At the end of the day (6 pm sharp) join us in our Bingo Hall for exciting, competitive (yet friendly) BINGO! and win one of the many fabulous prizes raffled off each night.

Fairview Senior Center- Beginning a new chapter of our lives, together.

Unfortunately, we all eventually come to the point in our lives when we need a little more help and full time care. If you’re a fall risk, for example, and need to be transitioned to life in a wheelchair at a place with full time caregivers. When that time comes, Sundown Estates Nursing Home is there. You can refer to their informational packet, with some excerpts below:

• Expansive soothing gardens to get the true nature experience!
  
• Hang out and play some cards in our spacious community lounges!
  
• Enjoy a meal (up to three daily) at our nutritious cafeteria that provides at least one menu option for every meal time!
  
• Want a taste of home? We provide comfortable family meetings designed to keep you safe.
  
• Our rooms are fully equipped with all the amenities you’ve come to expect, including your own nightstand!
  

Sundown Estates- A safe place to put your family.

General Mechanics

There will be two teams the Seniors (town) vs Staff (wolves)

• The beloved seniors residing at Fairview Senior Center. Grandpas, abuelas, omas, and bubbes. They’re retired, their kids are long grown and now raising their own kids. They’re living out their golden years among their peers, participating in retirement activities, the most sacred of which is BINGO. Unfortunately, someone keeps stealing the BINGO prizes donated by the seniors’ families, and they are not happy about someone getting between them and their BINGO games. Every day they’ll vote to remove someone from Fairview Senior Center
• The staff at the Fairview Senior Center. The staff are greedy and stealing BINGO prizes from the seniors. Every night, the staff will deem someone as a “fall risk” and have them shipped out to Sundown Estates Nursing Home for being such a troublemaker.
• The Seniors win if they can eliminate all of the Staff
• The Staff win when they outnumber the remaining Seniors

Each phase, we will reveal:

• Who was the vote target, how many votes they received, and their affiliation
• Who was sent to Sundown Estates Nursing Home and their affiliation

Roles

Each role may exist 0 or more times.

Seniors

Name	Description
Bubbe Ruth	She’s got the greatest soups in the facility. Come over to the Fairview Family Style Kitchen where she’ll whip you up a soup that’ll cure any ailment you have! Every night she will choose a target and their target is protected from being sent off to Sundown Estates Nursing Home. Cannot target the same person more than 3 times per game.
Opa Benjamin	He doesn’t have much to say, but he’s very perceptive. He seems to know things that nobody else does. Every night he will choose a target and find out the target’s affiliation.
Grammy Beverly	Nobody owns the power of persuasion like her. Give her a minute and she can convince you to do just about anything. 3 times per game, she can submit a call for the next phase to have a double vote.
Papa Herman	Has he ever told you about his time in the Big One? Sit down, you’re going to be here all night listening to his war stories. Every night, he will choose a target and that target will be unable to complete their action. Does not affect items. Cannot select the same target more than 3 times per game.
Grandma Carolyn	She’s got friends everywhere and they keep her informed about goings-on all over town. 3 times per game, she can choose to see the role of a player at Sundown Estates Nursing Home.
Gramps George	He’s a bit of a troublemaker - he’s got a new prank to play just about every day. Every night he will choose two targets to swap. Actions done onto his first target will now be done onto his second target and vice versa. Cannot target any person (either as Target 1 or Target 2) two phases in a row.
Mawmaw Rosie	She loves her mystery stories, especially Agatha Christie and Murder, She Wrote. She loves to investigate any little mystery she can find. Every night, she will choose a target and they will find out who their target submitted an action for that night, if any.
Abuelo Manuel	That old back injury keeps him up at all hours of the night, so he may as well look out the window and see what’s going on all over Fairview Senior Center. 3 times per game, he can choose to spy on a player and see everybody who visited that player in the night.
Memere Rita	Any grandmother would do anything for her children and grandchildren. Memere Rita sees everyone as her family. Every night, she will choose a target. If her target was scheduled to be shipped off to Sundown Estates Nursing Home, she will be shipped off instead.
Mami Anna	An avid casino visitor and gambling fanatic, Mami Anna will use any tactic at her disposal to win at BINGO. 3 times per game, she can choose to target a player and have them sent to Sundown Estates Nursing Home.
Grandparents	Regardless of if they’re a Pawpaw, Nana, Opa, Mummo, Abuela, or Mami, you better be prepared to get off of their lawns. While they don’t have actions, they can vote every day and earn items.

Staff

Name	Description
Nurse	The one in charge of everybody’s medical records… whether or not they’re accurate, who knows? Every night, they will have a player classified as a “fall risk” and have them shipped off to Sundown Estates Nursing Home.
Groundskeeper	Someone’s gotta shovel the sidewalk and make sure that the paths around Fairview Senior Center are flat. Unfortunately, with this guy around, you’ll never find any evidence of crimes. Every night, they will be able to choose a player’s affiliation to obscure. Has 33% chance of failure. Cannot target the same player twice in a row.
Hall Monitor	Retirement doesn't sit well with him, he needs a job to feel a sense of purpose. Despite being a Senior, he's more than happy to work with the Staff. They will begin the game as a Grandparent on the side of the Seniors, but will join the Staff if they would have been sent to Sundown Estates.
Cafeteria Worker	An expert at making everybody’s favorite comfort foods, which results in their target entering a food coma and falling asleep early. Every night, they will choose a target and that target will be unable to complete their action. Does not affect items. Cannot select the same target more than 3 times during the game.
Office Manager	A master at forging paperwork. Every night, they will choose a player and that player will show up as Staff to investigators. Cannot select the same target twice in a row.
The Administrator	The Fairview Senior Center simply couldn’t function without them! They are immune to being sent to Sundown Estates Nursing Home as a result of night actions or items.
Game Room Manager	Absolutely loves BINGO and runs the show! How could anybody ever suspect them? They will show up as being on the side of the Seniors when investigated
Security Guard	Patrols around the senior center, doing “routine checks”. If he saw how rowdy the BINGO games got, he’d be sure to shut that down. Once per game, they will choose a player to visit and every visitor to that player gets sent off to Sundown Estates Nursing Home.
Volunteers	When it’s not your job on the line, it can be even more difficult to resist the temptation of lifting a few prizes. After all, there are so many! Who’s going to miss a couple? Although they have no special abilities, they work with the rest of the staff.

No matter who is banned from Fairview Senior Center, the staff will always have the ability to deem seniors as “fall risks”.

Bingo

Bingo Prizes (Items) will be earned by playing BINGO! Details of how BINGO is played will be outlined in the Phase 0 event, but in summary:

• During Phase 0 players will have a chance to submit things that would be on their werewolf BINGO board
• Each player will be assigned a unique BINGO board
• When players find things in the threads that meet their BINGO criteria, they can call BINGO and submit their card to win an item
• You can only have one item at a time. If you currently hold an unused item, you will not be eligible to win a new one until it is used.

Item	Actions
Local Coupon Book	Causes the full voting results from the phase it is used to be posted.
Manicures for Two	Learn the name of one other player who shares your affiliation.
Deck of Cards	Causes your vote to be counted triple for the current phase.
Fresh Garden Produce Basket	Choose a person and see everyone who voted for them in that day’s vote.
Hand-knit Hat and Scarf	Choose a target and learn who they submitted an action on that phase.
Scrabble	Choose a target and prevent them from voting AND completing their night action.
Wine and Cheese Basket	Choose a target and redirect their action onto another player of your choice.
Weekend Getaway Stay at a local hotel	Choose a target. If they’re on the opposite side as you, they’re sent to Sundown Estates. If they’re on your side, you’re sent to Sundown Estates.
Massage Gift Certificate	Choose a target. Nobody can visit them that night.
Lotion Gift Set	Choose another player and render them invisible to any investigation that phase.
The Game of Life	Choose a target and see which role visited them that phase.
Fresh Bread Assortment	Choose another player. Anybody who visited them will now visit you. Anybody who visited you will now visit them.
Coffee and tea variety sampler	Choose someone and if they submitted an action, guarantee that it succeeds even when it wouldn't have otherwise.
Box of Chocolates	Choose to use your action and anybody who commented “first” will have their action fail for the next 3 nights.
Crocheted Doily	Find out any players who visited you the night you use this action.
MP3 Player	Prevent a player’s affiliation from appearing in the post when they’re sent to Sundown Estates.
Homemade Soup	Protect a target from removal from the house (vote or night action) for that phase.
Floral Arrangement	Remove 3 votes from your target.
Werther’s Originals	Send your target to Sundown Estates.
Beaded Necklace and Bracelet	Replicate the action of your first target onto your second target.
Cozy Wool Socks	Privately reveals role on death to your target.
Wind Chimes	Shows full vote tally from any previous phase
Leather Bound Journal	Allows player to send a message upon their death to another player. This message may not exceed 150 characters, including punctuation. This item must be submitted at any point before the end of phase before that player’s death, and may not be changed after submitting.
Grand Canyon Puzzle	Target someone in the current phase to publicly reveal their vote

Rules and Additional Information

Activity

If you fail to vote or submit a night action for 3 days total, you will be removed from the game.

Alt Accounts

We will not be allowing secret alt accounts for this game. Alt accounts which are publicly known are fine.

Editing Comments

If you are editing comments, it should be made clear why you’re editing. If you made an error, use strikethroughs on the information you want removed, but don’t delete it. If you want to add something, put it at the end what you’re adding. Do not share information, then immediately edit your comment to hide what you said from others.
Do not delete comments

Codes and Keys

Comments in this game should be in English and free of encryption. We ask that players do not try to find workarounds to this. Previous Removals
If you have been removed from 2 games in the past 12 months for inactivity or rule violations, you may not sign up for this game.

Discontinuation of the word “lynch” in HogwartsWerewolves Games

You may have seen the post “Hogwarts Werewolves and Social Justice” come up in the last week. If you haven’t read it already, we highly encourage you to read and discuss it with the rest of the community.

In short, as a mod team community, we believe that we should no longer use the term “lynch” in light-hearted fashion. As a Mafia-based community, many of our games revolve around phases often framed as “night kills” and “day lynches.” The word “lynch” has a long legacy of anti-Blackness and murder of Black people, Indigenous people, and members of other marginalized groups, and we feel that time is well overdue to examine what it means to continue using it as a descriptor of gameplay. While “lynch” is established Mafia terminology, it is also a word that is painful for many people to hear. We should not justify continuing to use it because it is still used commonly elsewhere. It is inappropriate and cruel to make a game out of generational trauma.

Again, we encourage the community to read the entirety of the post (linked above), as it provides further context for this decision, as well as discussion of alternative terms that can be used. We understand that this is a significant change in the way that we talk about our games, and mistakes will happen. We are not out to punish you if you forget to use an alternative word and we will apologize if we do. We are all working to be better people, but we’re all human and we need to be kind to each other while we all work towards removing lynch from our game vernacular.

Signups and Timeline

Signup using THIS LINK. Signups close at 10pm EST on Tuesday June 30. Role PMs will be sent out shortly after.
Phase 0 will start when role assignments go out (which will be shortly after the sign-up deadline. Phase 0 will last for approximately 2 days, though the confirmation period will be limited to the first 24 hours of that time.
Phase 0 will end at 10 pm (Eastern) on Thursday, July 2nd, and Phase 1 will begin shortly after.

Edits

• Limitations on use for roles added to their descriptions

Going through old issues of the Wrestling Observer Newsletter and posting highlights in my own words, continuing in the footsteps of daprice82. For anyone interested, I highly recommend signing up for the actual site at f4wonline and checking out the full archives.
• PREVIOUS •
1987
FUTURE YEARS ARCHIVE:
The Complete Observer Rewind Archive by daprice82

1-4-1988	1-11-1988	1-18-1988	1-25-1988
2-1-1988	•	•	•

• The wrestling war is, for all intents and purposes, over. The war between the territories, the ongoing collapse of the territory system, and Vince McMahon’s rise is certainly the biggest story in decades, and at this point the war is over and Vince McMahon has won. Sure, the fighting is still ongoing, but even if JCP can recover from their troubles, the gap between them and WWF is there and it’s just going to keep widening.
  
• The biggest story of the week is that WWF has announced its ppv schedule for the next year. March 27 (Wrestlemania IV), August 29, November 24 (Survivor Series), and January 15 (Royal Rumble). Four ppvs doesn’t look like a big deal, just capitalization on the market trend. But it’s going to have a major effect on Crockett. Crockett had been planning ppv shows in early April (Crockett Cup), July (Great American Bash), and November 24 (Starrcade). With WWF’s new calendar and the exclusivity clause in their ppv deals requiring no competing wrestling ppv events 60 days before and 21 days after their shows and the success of Survivor Series and Wrestlemania IV (presumed for that one - Dave expects Wrestlemania IV to be the biggest grossing ppv ever to this point), WWF is putting the squeeze to Crockett. And in doing so, they’re killing any chance Crockett can compete and break into the ppv market. Long-term, ppv is going to mean live gates will be completely insignificant (like it already is in boxing - and hey, in 2020 we have seen the prophecy fulfilled). Because of ppv, Dave expects Wrestlemania IV to gross as much as every other American promotion will gross for the entirety of 1988, combined. Hence why the gap is wide and will only get wider, and JCP will never catch up. JCP’s going to try to counter, and the apparent move will be to shift those events to prime-time WTBS live (or very recently filmed, like a Saturday Night’s Main Event) specials all built as major cards. Starrcade probably will not be among those, Dave figures this will help.
  
• WWF’s Royal Rumble came out the clear winner against the Bunkhouse Stampede Finals. The Rumble drew an 8.2 rating and was seen in 3.2 million homes, which is twice as many people as when Georgia Championship Wrestling’s show on WTBS was big several years ago when this wrestling war was getting started. It’s the highest rated show in the history of the USA network, and the encore broadcast on Monday drew a 4.8 rating (a regular episode of Prime Time Wrestling in that time slot usually draws a 2.9). All this means that the repeat showing of the Rumble was probably the second highest rated show on cable during the last week.
  
• PPV numbers take longer to get, but it’s possible to make some sense of preliminary reports for the Bunkhouse Finals. The show was likely profitable, purely in terms of money, but the reaction was strongly negative. Early reports estimate the buyrate at 4%, which tells us that if given a fair shot at ppv, Crocket could be profitable with a ppv line up. That’s also encouraging for Crockett, since the card wasn’t strong and the show didn’t have the best heat, but those things may be moot now that WWF has a full year’s schedule set up. Big props to the JCP broadcast team for how well they sold the ppv in advance, because ppv and closed-circuit purchases are majority (90%) last minute, as opposed to house show tickets which are typically bought well in advance.
  
• Wrestlemania IV is expected to sell out by the time this issue hits you. Yeah, Dave. By 32 years now. Anyway, about 14,000 seats went on sale to the general public on Saturday and all but a few thousand were sold by the end of the day. The highest price was $150. It’s funny to Dave that despite the crowd discrepancy, WWF may make as much off 14,000 tickets for Mania IV as they did selling 90,000 for Mania III (The April 3, 2000 issue is the earliest I can find for when Dave revised his view of the numbers for Wrestlemania 3). Anyway, the Convention Center is home to Trump Plaza Hotel and Casino, and Donald Trump is using Wrestlemania as the centerpiece of a weekend-long event designed to attract vacation families to his casinos, including a Gloria Estefan and Miami Sound Machine concert in the adjacent Convention Center ballroom. So I guess we can put Donald Trump down as the innovator of Wrestlemania weekend. WWF claims Wrestlemania will be available in up to 9 million homes on ppv, and if the show gets a similar buyrate to last year’s then we’re talking around $15 million on ppv, $1 million live, and probably $4-5 million at closed-circuit.
  

Watch: Dave Meltzer talks about Bresloff telling him 78,000

• The employment status of the Rock & Roll Express, Michael Hayes, and Steve Williams with JCP has significantly cleared up. The Rock & Roll Express were fired at the Bunkhouse Finals. On January 23, they were asked to do a clean job to Warlord and Ivan Koloff in 12 minutes. Koloff’s been a low card guy recently, and they have been main guys for years, so instead they did the job in 12 seconds (Ricky Morton laid down and let Warlord pin him). Then they flew to New York for the finals, and Dusty learned what happened (he was not at the show on the 23rd) and fired them on the spot. They could be heading anywhere, though WWF is doubtful due to their size. Michael Hayes was fired last week following an incident. He was teaming with Jimmy Garvin and feuding with Ric Flair on the most recent tour; those spots have been taken by Ron Garvin and Sting, the latter of whom is having an accelerated push as a result. Hayes is expected back at World Class, though he did send a resume to WWF. As for Steve Williams, he stayed an extra week in Japan and missed the Stampede. He’s in a contract dispute with Crockett over whether the money he makes in Japan counts against his guaranteed minimum pay from Crockett (Crockett says yes, Williams says no, you’re not paying it so it doesn’t count toward the minimum you are paying him - corporations are not your friends). Williams has disconnected his phone and is out of communication.
  
• Cable ratings for wrestling in the fourth quarter of 1987 dropped from the the third quarter. The World Championship Wrestling show dropped from second to eighth overall, and WWF’s All-American Wrestling surpassed it at seventh. Prime Time Wrestling, formerly ranked third, fell to tenth, while the Sunday WTBS show dropped from tenth to twentieth. AWA on ESPN dropped out of the top 20 (it was number 19 in the third quarter). Some of the drop probably comes from the change in how ratings are gathered (enter the Nielsen box, or “people-meter” as it’s known at this point). There’s controversy about this whole way of gathering ratings, as detractors believe that the boxes ensure shows that appeal to women will receive higher ratings than they would get otherwise. Regardless, wrestling shows across the board dropped about 10% in the ratings in the fourth quarter.
  
• New Japan’s “Martial Arts Olympic” event in the Tokyo Dome has some hoping it will surpass Wrestlemania 3 for biggest live gate ever. They’ve sold tickets at as much as $220 for ringside and sold out those events, so there’s a chance they could if they price right and sell out. Dave’s been told that Inoki vs. Koji Kitao has the potential to double the gate of Inoki’s matches with Leon Spinks and Masa Saito (each over $700,000). If they can get Taue, that’s probably the best opponent they can get for Inoki to ensure a big draw. I think last week he may have written All Japan, but he's very clear this is an Inoki idea this week.
  
• Speaking of Inoki, New Japan recently did a tour in Italy. The big show was January 24 in Rome and drew 8,000 fans. New Japan actually airs on tv in Italy, and Inoki was the big draw, and he pinned Badnews Allen in the main event. Shane Douglas won a battle royal on the show too. These are the first “western-style” pro wrestling matches in Italy since WWF did a show in Milan back in October.
  
• Jake Roberts was on Ellery Queen mystery magazine’s cover this month, and Muscular Development did a cover story on Jesse Ventura. The Ventura article is excellent, but mostly about his life and training regimen, and not to do with wrestling.
  

Jake Roberts on the cover of Ellery Queen Mystery Magazine

• Genichiro Tenryu won all the major awards in Japan. Tokyo Sports named in MVP of wrestling, and Gong Magazine and Weekly Pro Wrestling gave him the equivalent. He beat Riki Choshu in Gong’s annual popularity poll as the most popular Japanese wrestler (Maeda came in second, so pressure there for New Japan to bring him back). Chigusa Nagayo placed 9th, the first time a woman has cracked the top ten of Gong’s poll.
  
• Dave went to the WWF show at the Cow Palace on January 30. It’s his first live show since Japan, and the show drew pretty well, but not as well as you’d expect from a show with a battle royal in the area. The big news of the show were four no-shows: the British Bulldogs (Dave’s heard one of them collapsed at the airport and the other went to the hospital with him), Billy Jack Haynes (his health’s really bad and he’s missed a lot of bookings lately and folks are speculating his career is done), and Bam Bam Bigelow (scheduled to face Ted DiBiase, but he had knee surgery so no clue when he’ll be back). Due to the no-shows, the athletic commission ordered WWF to offer refunds to anyone who wanted them before the end of the second match. He runs down the card: Ron Bass pinned JYD, Ultimate Warrior pinned Harley Race. Warrior’s over big, but still sucks. Ted DiBiase beat George Steele by DQ and Dave alludes to last week’s decision to no longer call matches “abortions” and says “The only word to describe this match is one that has been banned from my vocabulary.” Don Muraco pinned Butch Reed in an okay match. The Jumping Bomb Angels beat the Glamour Girls to retain their tag titles in the only good match on the card (Dave gives it three stars). Noriyo Tateno pinned one of the Girls, Dave doesn’t identify her, saying “you know how it is with those people, they all look alike to me,” which is a pretty solid skewering of people who say that about the Angels and other Asian wrestlers, imo. Ted DiBiase won the bunkhouse battle royal to moderate heat. Hercules pinned Hillbilly Jim. Jim Duggan and Ken Patera beat Demolition and Mr. Fuji by pinning Fuji. Jake Roberts and One Man Gang went to a double countout.
  
• By the way, the California state assembly voted 60-7 to reclassify pro wrestling as entertainment and not a sport. So that means once the bill passes the state senate, athletic commissions will have no power over pro wrestling in California, and wrestlers will not need wrestling licenses to work in the state (which was already a joke of a requirement - Dave got a print-out once of all 60 wrestlers licensed in California and major guys like Hogan and Steamboat weren’t on the list).
  
• The lineup for AWA’s February 4 show, the last at the Minneapolis Auditorium before it’s demolished, has been announced. Curt Hennig defends the AWA Title against Greg Gagne in a cage match. The Midnight Rockers defend the tag titles against a mystery team (the latest announcement was Nick Kiniski and Kevin Kelly, but Kiniski was let go this week and they’re building to a face turn for Kelly). The rest of the card has Dick the Bruiser vs. Adnan al-Kaissey, Billy Robinson vs. Tom Zenk (particularly interesting since Robinson is in for a one-off but has a reputation as a shooter, as well as competing against Verne as a promoter sometimes, so there’s a chance he may go into business for himself), Wahoo McDaniel and Baron Von Raschke vs. The Nasty Boys, and Billy Jack Strong vs. Soldat Ustinov.
  
• Adrian Adonis broke his ankle at the AWA tv tapings in Minot, North Dakota.He was getting whipped into the turnbuckle and stepped into a hole in the ring. He won’t be back for at least two months. Adonis has about 4 months left before he dies.
  
• AWA released a song called “Superstars of the AWA.” Jerry Lawler and Jeff Jarrett were in it due to the increased swapping of talent between Memphis and AWA. I could not find the song.
  
• Something Dave forgot to mention about the WWF battle royal in San Francisco. Technically there were 19 guys, but only 18 actually worked the match. George Steele came out about a minute late, walked around the ring for a few minutes without getting inside, and then just walked to the back with JYD when JYD was eliminated (JYD was the second out of the match). Dave guesses at George’s age he didn’t want to take the bump or something. Dave recalls a story he heard about an unnamed WWF “neanderthal character” who stalled outside the ring for a complete match, and when one fan yelled to “Get in the ring, you lazy bum” he retorted (despite his character not being able to speak English): “What do you think this is, the NWA?”
  
• WWF Superstars tapings were held on January 26 in Hershey, Pennsylvania. Barry Horowitz and Steve Lombardi beat Lanny Poffo and Scott Casey, which set up the main event for the second hour of the taping where the Killer Bees beat Horowitz and Lombardi. Rick Rude and Ricky Steamboat had a match that ended in a big brawl that got Hercules, Harley Race, Jim Duggan, and Ultimate Warrior involved. The main event of the live show was not taped for tv, but had Hogan and Bigelow going over Andre and DiBiase (Hogan pinned DiBiase). Andre’s contribution to the match was one minute (of nine total for the match) in the ring, and a body slam to Hogan before almost collapsing. Commentary for this taping was not done live, but rather will be done in post-production due to the fact that they’re waiting for The Main Event first, since these will all air after that sets up the angles.
  
• Dave hears that the decision on what to do with Hogan/Andre at The Main Event will be decided this week once his filming schedule is determined. If he’s available for weekends, he’ll stay champion through the summer. If not, then a title change will happen and DiBiase is the likely beneficiary.
  
• [Stampede] Badnews Allen and Jason the Terrible were fined $200 and $300, respectively, by Calgary City Hall. This is in relation to their brawl in the audience on December 18 that led to a woman in the audience suffering a concussion.
  
• Oregon will be holding a special show on February 16 as a Frank Bonema Memorial show. Bonema was the tv announcer from Portland who passed away in 1982 or 1983. They haven’t announced any matches yet, but Curt Hennig is supposed to defend the AWA Title against their Northwest Title holder at the time, and there are plans for a tag title match, a strap match, and a cage match.
  
• The February 12 card will be the last card by Continental in Knoxville before Ron Fuller’s new promotion takes over the area from them. The situation with Alabama’s territory continues to confuse me.
  
• Nobuhiko Takada beat Owen Hart on January 13 in one of the highlights of New Japan’s jr. heavyweight tournament. As of January 26, here’s the status of the tournament: Koshinaka leads with 34 points (7-1 record), Takada has 31 points (6-1-1 record), Hart at 29 points (6-2 record), Hase also has 29 points. Yamazaki has 24 points (5-2 record), and Yamada is 4-2-1 with 21 points. Kobayashi has 24 (5-1), Saito at 19 (4-4), and everyone else is negligible at the moment. The finals will be on February 7.
  
• All Japan is pushing a big show for March 9 featuring Hansen vs. Tenryu. That will be a double title match, as Tenryu puts up the United National Title against Hansen’s PWF Title (Dave expects a double countout. Other matches will include Jumbo Tsuruta vs. Tiger Mask II, Baba and Wajima vs. Kimura and Tsurumi, and others.
  
• Giant Baba’s been negotiating with the Funks and David Manning about getting All Japan on tv in the U.S. All part of his angling to help the promotions outside the NWA and WWF against the juggernauts.
  
• AJW is building a big match for February 25, Dump Matsumoto’s retirement show. Dump and Yukari Omori (also retiring that night) will face the Crush Gals in a tag match. Also on the card will be a battle royal and Yumiko Hotta/Mitsuko Nishiwaki vs. Bull Nakano/Condor Saito for the vacant tag team titles.
  
• AJW’s annual rookie auditions took place on January 17 in Tokyo. 1500 girls showed up, and seven were picked based on their performance in various athletic and endurance drills. Dave says this is one of the main reasons it’s ridiculous to attempt to compare joshi wrestling to any American promotion. Only the top half a percent in terms of athletic ability are chosen for training in the first place, and then “they train them like spartans from the age of 15-17 and by the time they are around 22, if they’ve even survived, they are better workers than virtually all the men.” And with the retirement age of 26, nobody stays on so long they feel stale. Then again, that level of training sounds kind of easy to become mega abusive from a 2020 standpoint.
  
• Lots of rumor that NWA’s recent firings aren’t due to discipline issues but due to the company having financial issues. That’s the story those being fired have given. Michael Hayes in particular claims that he and Crockett agreed to a two year deal for $150k per year, but Crockett never signed it and when he pressured Crockett to sign (he wasn’t making money with the contract unsigned), and so he got fired for missing the January 23 show in Cincinnati. Even as Crockett’s financial issues become more and more apparent, they do seem to be recovering at the gate a little.
  
• Unlike WWF, NWA’s weightlifting competition used legit weights. All four guys did 460 pound bench presses easy, then Paul Ellering called to move the bar to 600. Animal failed first, and they threw chalk in his eyes and he bled and was “taken to the hospital” and the whole thing came across well.
  
• The road to Barry Windham joining the Horsemen (not that Dave suspects anything yet) continues as he and Luger are being pushed as a tag team. Meanwhile, Flair and Sting are set to feud.
  
• Dave once again clarifies about Hawk’s line (because apparently he’s still saying it). It’s Neo Maxi Zoom Dweebies, not Neo Nazi Zoom Dweebies.
  
• Crockett referee Jeff Goldberg writes in to correct the record on something. In the January 18 issue, a reader wrote in about the December 26 show in Philadelphia and said it looked like the referee screwed up the finish. Goldberg says he acted as instructed, and Flair would not have congratulated him later on if he had screwed up. He also says readers often blame referees for screwing up finishes, but that’s usually the wrestlers who screw up (or the finish is in fact supposed to look screwed up). Referees can be green just like wrestlers, but he’s proud not to be one of them.
  
• Another reader tells us that his cable company had Bunkhouse Stampede, but Crockett did a LOLNWA. Crockett announced that Sammons cable would have the show on January 23 (day before the ppv). Except they didn’t air the announcement until 2 pm that day, had given no announcement ahead of that time, and Sammons closed their company office for the weekend at noon on the 23rd.
  
• The longest letter this week is all about how Bret Hart deserves a bigger push. Brief version: Vince is making a big mistake by not pushing Bret as a singles star. Even the casual fans buy into him. He’s got promo ability, the ability to make a bad wrestler look good (very important in WWF), and he’d make a great opponent for Randy Savage after an Intercontinental Title change. Give it a few years, Jeff. You’ll get your wish and then some.
  
• Crockett’s apparently going to keep two offices open. The Dallas office will be for tv production, and the Charlotte office will remain as the base for talent.
  
• Mike Rotunda won the NWA TV Title from Nikita Koloff on January 26, then gave the Florida Title to Rick Steiner. Interestingly, Dusty did a promo referencing the Hogan/Andre/DiBiase title situation and said that in the NWA you can’t buy a title. Well, Dave points out, DiBiase offered $1 million to Hogan for the title, so that seems to be the going rate for the WWF championship for a year. Meanwhile, Rick Steiner got the Florida Title for free, which pretty accurately reflects the worth of that title.
  
• World Class drew a crowd of 80 in Houston on January 26. No, you didn’t read that number wrong.
  

THURSDAY: Hogan drops the WWF Title (really the only big story next week)

A few years ago, when I was a sysadmin at an SMB. Our CEO was retiring, and he was absolutely adored by all the staff. So much so, that when retirement time came around, the company threw a huge farewell for him at a casino, rented a ballroom & a bunch of rooms in the casino hotel, and flew the staff from all around the country to attend. This guy almost seemed like a cult leader, he was held in such high regard.
The venue was huge, and because there was a band, lighting (RGB chandeliers, robotic spotlights etc), AV presentations and microphones at play, the room hire came with two techs to run the show for the evening. They were set up with a variety of equipment - monitors, mixing desks and such - none of which I had any responsibility over. I supplied them with a couple of USB sticks of media from our side, made sure they could open the files. Everything was in hand, they had their run sheets for the night so I went and sat down at my table.
The night gets going and everyone is having a good time, getting merry and enjoying themselves. Throughout the food service, different speeches are planned and are underway. Randomly, the music from an adjoining ballroom starts playing over our room's system, blaring cheesy pop & dance music in short bursts. The MC was also our divisional manager - she was obviously annoyed but had little choice but to carry on with her hosting.
I went and talked with the AV techs after the speech. They advise me that there's nothing they can do.... their best guess is someone has wired up the two room systems incorrectly, and a channel from the DJ next door is outputting through our system. While we weren't using the system & the band was playing, everything was fine. They say they're handling it and have sent someone to see if there's anything that can be done.
Not feeling overly confident at this point, but this is way out of my hands. I go back to my seat as the next presentation is scheduled - a professionally made video, interviewing staff & colleagues past & present, very emotional stuff where people are so sad to see him go, crying in the video as they talk about what a great leader he was & how much he inspired them.
And then the music starts up again - that 'I'm blue, abu dee' song. And this time it doesn't stop. You can't even hear what the people in the video are saying.
The MC gets up and goes over to the AV techs, visibly very pissed off. She talks to them for a minute, and they stop the video. She gets back up on the mic with the music still playing in the background and apologises to the room, and then her next words make my heart drop to my stomach.
"Is u/Crudminer in the room???'
I know what she's expecting. I stand up from my table and begin to walk across the dancefloor towards the AV techs, panicking that I have absolutely no way of solving this. Feeling very self-conscious as everyone is looking at me. Someone starts clapping, and suddenly the entire room is clapping and cheering, as I'm apparently about to fix this issue I have no hope in hell of fixing. This just makes it about 1000x worse.
The techs look like they just want to die. They are so apologetic & reiterate to me that there's nothing that can be done to fix this from their end. I'm looking at their equipment which I have no knowledge of, pointing at some volume sliders asking super basic questions like 'Can we mute the channel that it's coming in on?' and 'can we switch to a local PA system' as workarounds.
And then the music just randomly stops. The guy they sent out to see if they can rewire or stop the DJ next door must have sorted it, I still don't know. To my company, it looks like I just walked up to these two AV guys, pointed at a few things & worked out the problem in less than a minute.
I spent the rest of the night on edge praying that it doesn't happen again, or at least if it does while I'm outside having a smoke... And thank the powers that be I wasn't required to point at stuff cluelessly a second time that night.

Once again, before I start my analysis on why I think Luchino Visconti's The Leopard is a fantastic adaptation, it should be worth noting that there ARE spoilers in this review regarding with both the film and the novel. If you haven't watched nor read the book or movie (I highly recommend you reading the book first and watching the movie after to appreciate this one), then go do so before reading this.
Warning: This review will spoil the last two chapters of the novel version. The movie doesn't show the last two chapters.
There has been a lot of wonderful adaptations from theater to the big screens, myth to big screen, maybe even a line from a song into a movie. But we cannot forget about the most common source of film adaptation: Books themselves. There has been a lot of successful and not-so-successful novels in the history of films including 2001: A Space Odyssey, The Martian, The Princess Bride, Casino, and the list of adaptations can go on forever. Film has always had some type of relationship with literature. Some novels depict different meanings and interpretations from the directors, most notably ones like A Clockwork Orange. However, there has been one adaptation that has stayed on my mind ever since I first watched it years ago. It was the story of Il Gattopardo or The Leopard, written by Giuseppe Tomasi di Lampedusa and then directed by Luchino Visconti, the movie itself is already a beautiful film about old Sicily.
So, what makes The Leopard so different from other adaptations. Let's go through a quick preview of the good qualities that I'll be talking about: It follows by the author's style of having a timeline of random events that are linked together, the cinematography captures Lampedusa's detailed portrait of Sicily, the acting is superb, and how Visconti implants the last two chapters into the film's third to final chapter or A Ball, November 1862. These three reasons mean more than what I have listed.
Starting off with the story structure in both versions, they don't have an actual linear story. There's not really a main problem, there's not a main antagonist, and there aren't any exterior conflicts to really sink into. When I first read this, I'll admit, I felt lost with what was going on. I didn't know what it was about and I was expecting some type of serious conflict going on. In fact, I knew it was going to be an interior conflict but much rather a more serious problem. After a while, the storyline sinks into me about halfway through the novel and I begin to understand much more of how Lampedusa writes it out. It's not a very easy story, but after you find the indirect, miniscule connection between these random events, they slowly knit themselves together for a good finale. Let's talk about the novel first for now. The story is about the chronicles of the final days of a dying clan in which there is always a prince (Or the leader of the family) that is called, "The Leopard." The main character, Prince Don Fabrizio (Played by Burt Lancaster in the film), is a grouchy prince that has strict rules and a strict schedule in his house and wherever he goes. His family fear him, the people try not to upset him, and his wife must control her tantrums before the Prince starts to get mad with her. At first, we don't see much of this guy. He's not sympathetic, kind, or the type of person we would want to be with. Later on, towards the end of the novel, Lampedusa specifically wrote the last parts of the novel with little to no attention towards this character. He turns sympathetic, old, sorrowful, and eventually dies off without much detail in the novel. In the movie adaptation, Visconti also follows Lampedusa's direction by showing his sorrow, pain, and his little to none screen time in the Ball sequence or the third act of the tale. There is a melancholic tone with how Visconti created the ending. It's much more different than the novel and there's an emptiness in that final act. Sure, Prince Fabrizio is just slowly walking off into the dark alley but nothing more, nothing less. We feel sad that we expected a superior and much more emotional ending. But Visconti took Lampedusa's interpretation of Sicily as an old city that always sticks to tradition, one that doesn't change so easily. Even in the end of the second act, Prince Fabrizio told Chevalley, a government official requesting Prince Fabrizio to be an appointed member of the Senate, hoping to hear and have some change in Sicily. Fabrizio refuses, saying that Sicilians aren't interested in change or even in politics for that matter. Sicily, for Lampedusa, is a place that rarely changes while the rest of Italy begins to change around them. They are a dying part of Italy but one that is still barely alive. With the sadness and the timeline of the story structure, Lampedusa and Visconti creates melancholy throughout the whole story to show the final days of Prince Fabrizio, the last Leopard. I think it's just one of those fascinating stories that Visconti adapted the same way Lampedusa did and I think it was a great choice.
The cinematography itself is also a grand masterpiece on it's own. There are several scenes in this film that uses an old but familiar technique called the deep focus/depth technique. First famously shown in Jean Renoir's The Rules of the Game and later with Orson Welles's Citizen Kane, The Leopard also uses this to display his shots as art rather than a literary device to tell multiple subplots or a different viewpoint of the situation. There are a few shots that do tell that different viewpoint but his deep-focus is what made his film so grand. One of my favorite shots in this film is in a scene where Prince Fabrizio, Chevalley, Tancredi (Played by Alain Delon), and a few other family members (I believe, if my mind doesn't trick me, also including Count Cavriaghi played by Terence Hill), are all playing cards together in the living room. They're talking, nothing dramatic about the situation. We just see a group of men playing cards while there is a large hallway filled with open doors. The depth on this shot is enormous and superb. The depth and the constant use of big hallways with open doors is a common trick even in Jean Renoir's 1939 classic. But Visconti uses this properly to create a painting itself. Renoir uses this technique to tell a story and to easily slide from one subplot to another while Visconti rarely moves the camera, letting it just stay there and let the audience sink into the painting itself. Of course, where the deep focus is at it's best would be none other than the ball sequence. With the duration of about 45 fast-paced minutes, Visconti creates a ball that is dazzling, lost, and completed with masterful composition and execution that compares to Kurosawa's strictly straightforward and symphonic composition and movements in nearly all the films he's made within his grand 30 film career. While this famous ball sequence makes it hard for us, the audience, to find our protagonists in the waltzes, it is purely intentional and reasonable to do so because no large party can make it easy for anyone to find somebody in the mass crowd of dresses, movement, and joy of everyone in that room (Hoping the screams are made of joy, not of fear). It is not nearly as great as Renoir's party sequence but the way Visconti continues on with the story is wonderful. Not a single minute was wasted in this sequence. The lighting is great, no shot ever felt unreasonable, and the use of long shots also gives the audience a moment of reflection and recovery from such dizzying and overwhelming amount of details in one scene alone from this movie at any point of the story, not just the ball itself. Lampedusa's novel is also quite overwhelming and might require one to take a rest from a chapter or a part in the story (The novel itself is made up of parts with no minor chapters. Every chapter is a part of the book so there's no minor checkpoints or save spots). Close-ups have been perfectly used and far-shots aren't too far for us to not be able to see the action. The position of the camera is used wonderfully, not indicating the wrong interpretation or feeling for the character themselves. Thank you Giuseppe Rotunno (The cinematographer) for properly understanding the craft, the importance of cinematography, and how this can tell a story indirectly but importantly. Giuseppe's work also contributes well to the spectacular performances of our main characters.
For acting, Burt Lancaster plays a character that isn't a direct rip from the original source novel. The novel depicts him as a mean and grouchy man. However, Burt's version is a much more calm, understandable, while intimidating at times of a character. It's also wonderful that despite it was against Visconti's vision to be playing him (Visconti didn't like Burt at first), he eventually got the respect and even the friendship with Visconti himself. They became great friends afterwards and it's very rare to have a Hollywood actor as kind, understandable, yet strong as Burt. One that has perhaps inspired some of the many other wonderful actors including Robert Mitchum (Who was making films the same period as Burt) and Arnold Schwarzenegger. His intense expressions in the film subtly hints at what Lampedusa's version of the character originally was. While he plays a different type of character, he also respects the author's original view on the character. I would go as far to say that I enjoy Burt's version of the character much more than the novel itself. There's a certain charm that Lancaster brings into his role that clicks wonderfully in the adaptation that Lampedusa's version couldn't exactly hold. Not all the praise is going to the already fascinating Burt but also everyone else in the film. Claudia's character plays with a sense of class but also the implication and body language of an immature girl inside. She is perhaps the only perfect role in the film as she is the only one in that entire film's cast that is Italian or at least looks like Italian. She's charming but it's not her charm that takes the showcase but also her brilliant level of acting. While I love Cardinale and Lancaster, I think the one that really took the show was Alain Delon's portrayal of Tancredi Falconeri. His role is played with such power and ferociousness that many might end up thinking that he could've been the next Leopard. His character is very relaxed, interesting, and fun to watch on screen. He plays as the young and daring boy going headfirst into war. While my descriptions on him don't feel like justice to how I love his role in this film, there is one scene in particular that I really think was executed fairly well and just may be one of those scenes in the film that many have overlooked on. In the scene that I will be discussing, Tancredi (Alain Delon) meets Angelica (Claudia Cardinale) for the first time and fascinated but also falling love with her at the same time. Meanwhile, Concetta (Lucilla Morlacchi), a lady who has been with Tancredi and in love with him at the same time, doesn't speak much during the conversation but rather developing somewhat of a jealousy for her. If it isn't jealousy, then who knows what really went on her mind? Both the novel and the film itself points the spotlight towards Tancredi and Angelica. Tancredi tells them about a story of his time at the army when he stormed into a convent. In the end, he told Angelica that if she was there, the soldiers wouldn't have needed the nuns. Angelica laughs wholeheartedly at this story while Concetta misunderstood the story and gets upset at Tancredi and his inappropriate story. She turns her back to him and walks away. Given the context, the reason why this certain scene in the story is so great can only be explained through the last chapter of the book. This leads me to the final point of this essay, the masterful and rewarding foreshadowing of the film.
At this point, this is where spoiler territory comes in. In the final chapter of the novel version, Angelica and Concetta are two elderly women living in their dead mansion in early 1900s Italy. One day, Tassoni visits Concetta. Tancredi, who married Angelica sometime between the 1862-1883, has already died sometime ago from old age while Angelica is still alive and just met Concetta right before the scene I am about to introduce. Everyone else has already died long ago, leaving Angelica, Tassoni, Concetta, Carolina, and Caterina (The last two mentioned are younger sisters of Concetta) as the last of their family and the last living characters in the story. Tassoni reveals to Concetta that Tancredi always loved her and even Lampedusa hinted a detail in the chapter, "Love at Donnafugata," that Tancredi and Angelica's love relationship would never been as wonderful as it will ever be other than that time in the chapter when they were running around in the old mansion. While there were no arguments or any contempt mentioned in this story, he didn't make them live happily ever after like a fairy tale. Sure, they loved each other but it was really Concetta that Tancredi truly loved. And you know which scene in the story did he showed his love for her once? Yes, the dinner scene where he was telling the story. He was nervous to even talk to her and often talked to Angelica instead. Alain Delon does justice to this scene by having his character tell the story while giving off quick, frantic nervousness in his body language by having his eyes look behind him where Concetta is sitting every few seconds while also stuttering and moving more than usual. The body language isn't easy to notice if you have never read the book or found out about his love for Concetta (Even though he did love her in the beginning) but for those who have read the book, I highly advise you to observe Delon's body language in this scene the next time you watch this (If you noticed it, I'm very proud of you that I'm not the only one to have noticed this). Tassoni told Concetta that Tancredi confessed that the story about the convent was all a lie and that he wanted to kiss Concetta when she reacted with anger to the story. The grief of Tancredi's character stayed with him forever until his death and this just may be one of the reasons why Tancredi and Angelica's relationship never soared off. It was because he never loved her truly as Angelica and he lost the chance of loving Concetta. An unforeseen tragedy that the film barely shown (The tragedy of the relationship with Tancredi and Concetta actually occurs in the Ball chapter of the film but never goes into full depth as the novel did). The film itself didn't just foreshadow the last chapter but also the second to last chapter that didn't make it. The second to last chapter is also in the Ball chapter. The novel never discussed it nor mention anything about the painting on the wall in the library room. In the film, Prince Fabrizio goes into the library to take a rest from the exhausting and youthfully energetic ballroom waltzes and discussions. His face all sweaty and a tired expression wearing him down. He notices a painting above a mantelpiece. The painting shows a dying man in his bed with his loved ones, including his dog, around him at his final moments. The pain and sadness in the man's expression as everyone around him weep in a emotionally brutal image. Prince Fabrizio looks at this image for a long time before being interrupted by Tancredi and Angelica. The foreshadowing here is much more obvious than the example I gave above. In that second to last chapter, Prince Fabrizio dies from old age in a hotel room in Sicily. The date was July 1883 and everyone, including Tancredi and his favorite dog, Bendico, are watching him at his last minutes. It is a tragic scene that Visconti couldn't shoot but rather symbolize in the ballroom sequence which I think is one of the best uses of foreshadowing.
After my initial viewing of The Leopard, I fell in love and understood why director Martin Scorsese admired this film so much. Other than the beautiful cinematography done by Giuseppe Rotunno, there's a whole layer of appreciation to the novel that the readers can admire that Visconti understood. He implanted the last two chapters of the story, made sure the actors like Delon are hinting at a much more detailed character study, and capturing the colossal and challenging of the story with deep, lyrical cinematic poetry. I think I can safely say that Luchino Visconti's The Leopard is an adaptation masterpiece and one that I would recommend people reading first before watching. You wouldn't be appreciating as much as I did if you haven't read the novel. After countless films and adaptations, this one is one of the few films I have seriously enjoyed and appreciated in a long time.
The Leopard is a spectacular, complex novel and Visconti did more than just making another great film, he gave us, what I consider, one of the greatest adaptations.
Thanks for reading. Sorry for the long post btw. This is not for school I swear!

This will continue to be updated as long as there are updates to provide.

• ABC15 has a pretty good list going - keep checking it for updates.
  
• Phoenix New Times article of events being canceled or postponed. Keep an eye on this for updates too.
  

Schools

Gov. Doug Ducey announces statewide closure of schools over coronavirus
Please check with your individual district/school for further information on re-openings.
Colleges

• ASU
  
• UofA
  
• NAU
  
• Maricopa Community Colleges
  
• GCU
  

Restaurants

• Pei Wei statement

Sports

• NBA
  
• WNBA
  
• MLB
  
• NHL
  
• NFL
  
• USL
  
• NCAA
  
• IFL
  
• Phoenix Cup
  

Concerts

List of events/concerts/happenings/attractions that are Postponed - unless otherwise noted as of 03/17/2020 (please always check event website for ticket information).
Orpheum
All shows through the end of March are currently postponed.
Gila River Arena

• Rage Against The Machine
  
• Celine Dion
  
• Pearl Jam
  
• Jojo Siwa - Rescheduled
  
• Nick Cannon’s Wild ‘N Out Tour
  
• Jim Kieffer Community Cook-Off- Canceled
  
• PBR (Professional Bull Riders) - Canceled
  

Talking Stick Resort Arena (TSR)

• André Rieu
  
• Foo Fighters from TRSA Twitter
  

Marquee Theatre

• All events in March have been postponed, keep checking their website for updates.

Crescent Ballroom and Valley Bar closed until further notice. Keep checking their social media for further updates. COCINA 10 will be open limited hours for take-out orders.
The Van Buren - All shows scheduled to take place through the end of March have already been canceled, rescheduled or postponed. See website for further details. Further shows are still be canceled, rescheduled or postponed by the artists.
Chandler Center for the Arts

• All events at Chandler Center for the Arts have been postponed or rescheduled through April 30th.

Mesa Arts Center
Out of an abundance of caution, and to support other preventive measures underway, beginning Monday, March 16, and continuing through Sunday, March 29, the City of Mesa is closing the theaters at Mesa Arts Center
Arizona Federal Theatre

• LFA 84
  
• Prince Royce - Canceled
  
• Iliza Shlesinger
  
• John Crist - Canceled
  
• Dancing with the Stars: Live!
  
• Thom York
  
• NEHA KAKKAR
  
• Premier Boxing Champions - Canceled
  
• In this Moment & Black Veil Brides
  

Festivals are all postponed unless otherwise noted.

• Scottsdale Arts Festival - Canceled
  
• Italian Festival of Arizona
  
• Luke Days - Canceled
  
• Pride Run Phoenix - Canceled
  
• Phoenix Pride Festival and Parade
  
• Tempe Festival of the Arts - Canceled
  
• Arizona Game Fair
  
• Phoenix Lights Fest or Relentless Beats
  
• Downtown Mesa Brew Fest - Canceled
  
• Phoenix Blues, Brews, and BBQ Festival
  
• Modern Phoenix has rescheduled some events. Check website for details.
  
• Gilbert Pizza Festival
  
• Arizona Bao and Dumpling Festival - Canceled
  
• Gem City Sours & Ciders Festival
  
• Arizona Arab American Festival
  
• Anthem Days - Canceled
  
• Arizona Dragon Boat Festival - Canceled
  
• Chandler Jazz Festival - Canceled
  
• Nirvana Food & Wine Festival
  
• A’REZZ’ONA
  
• UFEST 2020
  
• Pat's Run - Canceled but going virtual
  
• Scottsdale Fashion Week
  
• Phoenix Film Festival
  

Attractions that are suspending or restricting operations

• Great Wolf Lodge
  
• Crayola Experience in Chandler
  
• Children's Museum of Phoenix
  
• Phoenix Art Museum - museum open but all on-site and off-site programs and events, including daily public and school tours are cancelled through April 3.
  
• Six Flags Hurricane Harbor Phoenix
  
• Turf Paradise
  
• Medieval Times
  
• Changing Hands Bookstore has canceled all in-store and offsite events through March 31. Ticket refunds should be requested through Eventbrite.
  
• Tovrea Castle at Carraro Heights will postpone all Tours, Events and Garden Days from March 19 – April 26, 2020.
  
• Arizona Science Center
  
• Harkins Theatres
  
• AMC Theatres
  
• Phoenix Art Museum - now closed through April 6th.
  
• Maricopa County Library District
  
• Mesa Public Libraries
  
• Phoenix Public Libraries
  
• Tempe Public Library
  

List of events/happenings/attractions that are still taking place or to remain open as of 03/17/2020. Always check event website before leaving to ensure most current information.

• Phoenix Zoo
  
• Desert Botanical Garden
  
• Arizona Boardwalk (Butterfly Wonderland, Odysea Aquarium, Titanic: The Artifact Exhibition)
  
• Phoenix Art Museum
  
• Renaissance Festival has now ended their season.
  
• Arizona Science Center
  
• LEGOLAND Discovery Center Arizona
  
• Castles N Coasters
  
• Japanese Friendship Garden
  
• Out of Africa Wildlife Park
  
• Wildlife World Zoo, Aquarium & Safari Park
  
• Boyce Thompson Arboretum
  
• Stand Up Live
  
• Tempe Improv
  

Venue Links, Statements and Contact Information

• The Van Buren
  
• Marquee Theatre
  
• Crescent Ballroom or 602-716-2222
  
• Talking Stick Resort Arena
  
• Gila River Arena
  
• Chase Field
  
• Orpheum Theatre
  
• State Farm Stadium
  
• Ak-Chin Pavilion
  
• Mesa Amphitheatre
  
• Mesa Convention Center
  
• Mesa Arts Center
  
• Celebrity Theatre
  
• Scottsdale Center For The Performing Arts
  
• Chandler Center for the Arts
  
• ASU Gammage Auditorium
  
• Harrah’s Ak Chin Casino
  
• MIM Concerts
  
• Arizona Federal Theatre
  
• Stand Up Live
  
• Tempe Improv
  
• Tempe Center for the Arts has canceled all events through April 30th.
  
• Talking Stick Resort and Casino
  
• Master list from Ticketmaster of Phoenix area shows with any ticket status other than normal. It is constantly updated.
  

Misc. Government and Utility Updates

• SRP
  
• APS
  
• City of Tempe
  
• City of Phoenix
  
• City of Glendale
  
• City of Avondale
  
• City of Surprise
  
• The Arizona Legislature has indefinitely closed the Senate and House public galleries.
  
• The Judicial Branch of Arizona says prospective jurors who are sick or experiencing symptoms can call the Jury Office at 602-506-5879 to discuss postponing service.
  
• Navajo Nation Closes Tribal Parks to include Monument Valley Navajo Tribal Park, Little Colorado River Tribal Park, Four Corners Monument, Lake Powell Navajo Tribal Park (Antelope Canyon) and Canyon de Chelly.
  
• Havasupai Tribe: Tourism to Havasu Falls, Mooney Falls, Beaver Falls suspended until April 14
  

The original Megathread got archived automatically by Reddit, so I've now re-upped it.
This megathread is to compile all the information into 1 place so that information can be accessed more easily and smoothly. Please post all questions/comments on this thread. This includes selling/buying tickets, meetup plans, etc. Any further posts about the tour, including questions, will be removed.
Please feel free to use the "#live-shows" channel on the subreddit Discord server to discuss and post about the tour.
Next, please use Reddit’s spoiler feature when discussing things about the tour that others want to be surprised about. As posted in the sidebar, you can now hide your text on Reddit, so please utilize this feature in posts and comments. Don’t ruin the fun for other members of the horde!

Media

The tour will feature the brand new, highly-anticipated “Cube V3” – with new visuals completely designed by Deadmau5 himself!

• Cube V3 Teaser Timelapse
  
• Cube V3 Rehearsal Timelapse (360° video)
  
• Cube V3 Debut @Ultra Music Festival 2019 – Full Set (SPOILERS, DUH) (You can check out the UMF megathread here)
  
• Cube V3 UMF Recap/Hype Video
  
• Tour Rehearsal Day 1 Recap
  
• Timelapse Teaser 2
  
• Creamfields Recap
  
• Sam Sheffer Cube V3 Behind The Scenes
  
• Cube V3 Instagram AMA
  
• Dallas Show Recap
  
• Los Angeles Shows Recap
  
• Los Angeles Pop-Up Shop Recap
  
• Detroit Shows Recap
  
• Red Rocks Shows Recap
  
• Denver Pop-Up Shop Recap
  
• My Turning Point Podcast Interview
  
• NYE Countdown
  

NOTE: While the UMF 2019 set may spoil some things for the tour, Joel has confirmed on Reddit that there will be A LOT of changes for the tour - including new visuals and NEW MUSIC! Ultra was essentially just a way to test out the new system before tour season begins.

For those who cannot make it to the show, here's a recording of one of the shows in full (Though keep in mind the setlist changes each show)

Tour website: www.CubeV3.com

• Tour schedule
  
• Buy tickets
  
• Sign up for text updates
  

New merch website: www.Mau5Hop.com

Tour Dates:

• [NEW ADDED SHOW] Aug. 23 - Cheshire, United Kingdom - Creamfields
  
• [SOLD OUT] Sep. 12 – Dallas, Texas – Southside Ballroom (No Mana & E̶D̶D̶I̶E̶ Bentley Dean)
  
• [NEW ADDED SHOW] Sep. 13 – Dallas, Texas – Southside Ballroom (i_o & Monstergetdown)
  
• Sep. 19 – Austin, Texas – ACL Live at the Moody Threatre (BlackGummy & Monstergetdown)
  
• [SOLD OUT] Sep. 20 – Austin, Texas – ACL Live at the Moody Threatre (Sian & Sara Landry)
  
• [SOLD OUT] Sep. 21 – Austin, Texas – ACL Live at the Moody Threatre (No Mana & E̶D̶D̶I̶E̶ Bentley Dean)
  
• [SOLD OUT] Sep. 25 – Los Angeles, California – Hollywood Palladium (ATTLAS & i_o + SPECIAL GUEST SOFI)
  
• [SOLD OUT] Sep. 26 – Los Angeles, California – Hollywood Palladium (i_o & Sian)
  
• [SOLD OUT] Sep. 27 – Los Angeles, California – Hollywood Palladium (i_o & E̶D̶D̶I̶E̶ Julian Gray)
  
• [SOLD OUT] Sep. 28 – Los Angeles, California – Hollywood Palladium (No Mana & i_o)
  
• [NEW ADDED SHOW] Sep. 29 – Los Angeles, California – Hollywood Palladium (i_o & Monstergetdown)
  
• Oct. 5 – Phoenix, Arizona – Comerica (MSTRKRFT, Sian, Sysdemes)
  
• [SOLD OUT] Oct. 11 – San Jose, California – San Jose Civic Center (LIGHTS: Remix Set & Sian)
  
• Oct. 12 – San Jose, California – San Jose Civic Center (MSTRKRFT & Sian)
  
• [NEW ADDED SHOW] Oct. 17 – Detroit, Michigan – The Filmore (Liquid Stranger & Callie Reiff)
  
• [SOLD OUT] Oct. 18 – Detroit, Michigan – The Filmore (Liquid Stranger & Callie Reiff)
  
• [SOLD OUT] Nov. 1 – Morrison, Colorado – Red Rocks Amphitheatre (i_o, LIGHTS: Remix Set, Callie Reiff)
  
• [NEW ADDED SHOW] Nov. 2 – Morrison, Colorado – Red Rocks Amphitheatre (Getter, Callie Reiff)
  
• [SOLD OUT] Nov. 14 – Houston, Texas – Revention Music Center (LIGHTS: Remix Set, Monstergetdown)
  
• [NEW ADDED SHOW] Nov. 15 – Houston, Texas – Revention Music Center (MSTRKRFT, Jay Robinson)
  
• Nov. 29 – Washington, DC – The Anthem (ATTLAS, Monstergetdown)
  
• [NEW ADDED SHOW] Nov. 30 – Washington, DC – The Anthem (MSTRKRFT, Jay Robinson)
  
• Dec. 7 – Minneapolis, Minnesota – The Armory (K?D, Mad Zach)
  
• Dec. 14 – Milwaukee, Wisconsin – Wisconsin Center (Chris Lake, Mad Zach)
  
• Dec. 19 – Seattle, Washington – WAMU Theatre (MSTRKRFT, QRION)
  
• Dec. 30 – San Francisco, California – Bill Graham Civic (Justin Martin, QRION)
  
• [NEW ADDED SHOW] Dec. 31 - San Francisco, California - Bill Graham Civic (Lights: Remix Set, Justin Martin, Qrion)
  
• [SOLD OUT] Jan. 15 – Boston, Massachusetts – House Of Blues (MSTRKRFT, Jay Robinson)
  
• [NEW ADDED SHOW] Jan. 16 – Boston, Massachusetts – House Of Blues (MSTRKRFT, Jay Robinson)
  
• [NEW ADDED SHOW] Jan. 17 – Boston, Massachusetts – House Of Blues (LIGHTS: Remix Set, Jay Robinson)
  
• [NEW ADDED SHOW] Jan. 18 – Boston, Massachusetts – House Of Blues (Jay Robinson)
  
• Jan. 23 – Philadelphia, Pennsylvania – Metropolitan Opera House (LIGHTS: Remix Set, Jay Robinson)
  
• [NEW ADDED SHOW] Jan. 24 – Philadelphia, Pennsylvania – Metropolitan Opera House (Jay Robinson)
  
• [SOLD OUT] Feb. 1 – Chicago, Illinois – Navy Pier](https://www.ticketmaster.com/event/07005681BA7C22CD) (Getter, BlackGummy)
  
• [SOLD OUT] Feb. 6 – Brooklyn, New York – Avant Gardner - Great Hall (LIGHTS: Remix Set, Callie Reiff, Jay Robinson)
  
• [SOLD OUT] Feb. 7 – Brooklyn, New York – Avant Gardner - Great Hall (MSTRKRFT, Callie Reiff, Jay Robinson)
  
• [SOLD OUT] Feb. 8 – Brooklyn, New York – Avant Gardner - Great Hall (Callie Reiff, Jay Robinson)
  
• [NEW ADDED SHOW] Feb. 9 – Brooklyn, New York – Avant Gardner - Great Hall (Callie Reiff, Jay Robinson)
  

Set times, ticket prices, age restrictions, and other regulations vary for each venue, so your best bet for specific venue questions would be to visit venues' websites or call them.

The set length will be about 2 hours and 15 minutes, and the opening sets will each be about an hour long.

VIP PACKAGES:

1) deadmau5 On Stage Experience:
-One Premium Reserved or General Admission ticket to the show
-One (1) Meet & Greet with deadmau5*
-One (1) Individual photo with deadmau5*
-The ability to watch the first 3 songs of deadmau5’s set, side-stage*
-Exclusive access to special VIP pre-show production tour (see the new cube up close and personal)*
-One commemorative VIP laminate
-One exclusive merchandise item
-Priority entry into the venue*
2) deadmau5 VIP Meet & Greet Experience:
-One Premium Reserved or General Admission ticket to the show
-One (1) Meet & Greet with deadmau5*
-One (1) Individual photo with deadmau5*
-Exclusive access to special VIP pre-show production tour (see the new cube up close and personal)*
-One commemorative VIP laminate
-One exclusive merchandise item
-Priority entry into the venue*
3) deadmau5 VIP Cube Tour Experience:
-One Premium Reserved or General Admission ticket to the show
-Exclusive access to pre-show production tour*
-One commemorative VIP laminate
-One exclusive merchandise item
-Priority entry into the venue*
* = no liquids permitted side stage (alcohol, soda, etc)*side stage locations will operate in a different format from city to city depending on local venue capabilities *production tour done in groups of 10*meet & greet and photo opportunity may occur after general doors have opened

MORE DATES WILL BE ANNOUNCED SOON:

No need to complain yet that you don’t see the city that you wanted. Joel also confirmed on Mau5Trap Radio Episode #28 that although this first part of the tour is United States only, they are working on plans for worldwide dates afterwards.
GUEST VOCALS:

• LIGHTS (EVERY SHOW)
  
• SOFI (Select shows only)
  

OPENERS: (In alphabetical order:)

• ATTLAS
  
• BlackGummy
  
• Callie Reiff
  
• E̶D̶D̶I̶E̶ (EDIT: CANCELLED DUE TO VISA ISSUES - replaced by Bentley Dean & Julian Gray)
  
• Getter
  
• i_o
  
• Jay Robinson
  
• Justin Martin
  
• k?d
  
• LIGHTS
  
• Liquid Stranger
  
• Mad Zach
  
• Monstergetdown
  
• MSTRKRFT
  
• No Mana
  
• QRION
  
• Sara Landry
  
• Sian
  
• Sysdemes
  

AFTERPARTIES:

• Sep. 13 – Dallas, Texas – Stereo Live (Deadmau5, i_o, Monstergetdown)
  
• Sep. 20 - Austin, Texas - Cedar Street Courtyard (Deadmau5, No Mana, Monstergetdown, Sian)
  
• Sep. 27 - Los Angeles, California - Academy LA (Deadmau5, ATTLAS, No Mana, Monstergetdown)
  
• Sep. 28 - Los Angeles, California - Exchange LA (Testpilot, Anakim, John Monkman)
  
• PRE-PARTY: Sep. 29 - Los Angeles, California - Academy LA (ATTLAS, No Mana, i_o, Sian, Sysdemes)
  
• Nov. 1 - Denver, Colorado - Beta Nightclub (i_o, No Mana)
  
• Nov. 2 - Denver, Colorado - Temple Denver (Deadmau5, Callie Reiff)
  
• Nov. 14 - Houston, Texas - Spire Night Club (Deadmau5)
  
• Nov. 15 - Houston, Texas - Clé Houston (Deadmau5)
  
• Nov. 29 - Washington, DC - Soundcheck Nightclub (Deadmau5)
  
• Dec. 5 - Miami, Florida - Club Space - (Testpilot, Rinzen, Richie Hawtin, Paco Osuna) (Unrelated to tour)
  
• Dec. 6 - Miami, Florida - Story Nightclub (Deadmau5) (Unrelated to tour)
  
• PRE-PARTY: Dec. 7 - Miami, Florida - Corona Electric Beach (No Mana, MSTRKRFT, C.H.A.Y, SIAN)
  
• Dec. 19 - Seattle, Washington - Q Nightclub (Deadmau5, MSTRKRFT)
  
• SUPER LATE SHOW: Dec. 31 - San Francisco, California - 1015 Folsom (Testpilot, Rinzen, Qrion, Alex Sibley)
  
• Jan. 14 - Mashantucket, Connecticut - Shrine Nightclub (Deadmau5) (Unrelated to tour)
  
• Jan. 17 - Boston, Massachusetts - BIJOU Nightclub (Testpilot, Rinzen)
  
• Jan. 18 - Boston, Massachusetts - Big Night Live (Deadmau5)
  
• Jan. 25 - Atlantic City, New Jersey - HQ2 Nightclub (Deadmau5) (Unrelated to tour)
  
• Feb. 1 - Chicago, Illinois - Concord Music Hall (Testpilot, Rinzen)
  
• Feb. 8 - Brooklyn, NY - Avant Gardner (MANY artists; listed below)
  

1. Great Hall Stage: Testpilot, Layton Giordani, Rinzen
   
2. Kings Hall Stage: ATTLAS, BlackGummy, MSTRKRFT, SIAN, Speaker Honey
   
3. Lost Circus Stage: Todd Edwards, Jay Robinson, Gooey Vuitton
   

LOS ANGELES POP-UP SHOP:

What:

• Special pop-up shop with an interactive art & music installation (powered by Specdrums from Sphero)
  
• Buy exclusive merch
  
• See special displays (i.e. mau5heads, McLaren 720s Spider, etc.)
  
• Meet Mau5Trap artists & get stuff signed
  
• Drink Corona
  

Where:

• Sunset Strip - 1114 Horn Ave, West Hollywood, CA 90069

When:

• Thurs. September 26th to Sat. September 28th
  
• 12:00PM - 8:00PM PDT
  
• Deadmau5 signing from 3:00PM - 5:00PM PDT on 26th and 27th
  
• i_o signing from 2:00PM -5:00PM PDT on 27th; 4:00PM - 6:00PM on 28th
  
• Various Mau5Trap artists appearing/signing on 28th (including a Q&A panel from 1:00PM - 2:00PM PDT)
  

DENVER POP-UP SHOP:

What:

• Special pop-up shop with an interactive art & music installation (powered by Specdrums from Sphero)
  
• Buy exclusive merch
  
• See special displays (i.e. mau5heads, McLaren 720s Spider, etc.)
  
• Meet Mau5Trap artists & get stuff signed
  
• Drink Corona
  

Where:

• 2100 Larimer Street, Denver, CO 80205 (Intersection of Larimer & 21st Street)

When:

• Fri. November 1st to Sat. November 2nd
  
• 11:00PM - 8:00PM MDT (both days)
  
• Deadmau5 signing from 2:00PM - 4:00PM MDT (both days)
  
• i_o signing from 5:00PM - 5:45PM MDT (Nov. 1 only)
  
• Other Mau5Trap artists signing from 5:30PM -7:30PM MDT (Nov. 2 only)
  

NEW YORK CITY POP-UP SHOP:

What:

• Special pop-up shop with an interactive art & music installation (powered by Specdrums from Sphero)
  
• Buy exclusive merch
  
• See special displays (i.e. mau5heads, McLaren 720s Spider, etc.)
  
• Meet Mau5Trap artists & get stuff signed
  
• Drink Corona
  

Where:

• 260 Johnson Ave, Brooklyn, NY, 11206

When:

• Thurs. February 6th to Sun. February 9th
  
• 12:00PM - 6:00PM EST (both days)
  
• Deadmau5 signing from 3:00PM - 5:00PM EST (Feb. 7th & Feb. 8th only)
  

SETLIST:

NOTE: Keep in mind, the below setlist compiles every track he's played at the shows so far in order - so therefore, he doesn't play ALL of these songs each show. Every show has a slightly different setlist.
BOLDED = Unreleased

1. Deadmau5 - No Problem (Intro Edit)
   
2. Deadmau5 - Where My Keys
   
3. Deadmau5 - Infra Turbo Pigcart Racer
   
4. Deadmau5 - Suckfest 9001
   
5. Deadmau5 - Some Chords
   
6. Deadmau5 - Some Chords (Dillon Francis Remix)
   
7. Deadmau5 - Maths
   
8. Deadmau5 - Maths (Cobra Effect Remix)
   
9. Deadmau5 - Coelacanth (OV)
   
10. Deadmau5 - My Pet Coelacanth
    
11. Deadmau5 - Moar Ghosts ‘N’ Stuff
    
12. Deadmau5 Ft. Rob Swire - Ghosts ‘N’ Stuff
    
13. Deadmau5 Ft. Rob Swire - Monophobia
    
14. Deadmau5 - Cthulhu Sleeps
    
15. Deadmau5 - Imaginary Friends
    
16. Deadmau5 - FML (Intro Edit + “I Remember” Vocal Edit)
    
17. Deadmau5 – Fall
    
18. Deadmau5 - Sometimes Things Get, Whatever
    
19. Deadmau5 - Avaritia (“The Longest Road” Vocal Edit)
    
20. Deadmau5 - Three Pound Chicken Wing (“The Longest Road” Vocal Edit)
    
21. Deadmau5 - Where Phantoms Sleep ("The Longest Road" Vocal Edit)
    
22. Deadmau5 Ft. Greta Svabo Bech - Raise Your Weapon [Featuring live vocals from LIGHTS]
    
23. Deadmau5 Ft. Greta Svabo Bech - Raise Your Weapon (Noisia Remix) [Featuring live vocals from LIGHTS]
    
24. Deadmau5 Ft. LIGHTS - Drama Free [Featuring live vocals from LIGHTS]
    
25. Deadmau5 - Midas’ Heel
    
26. Deadmau5 Ft. Shotty Horroh - Legendary
    
27. Deadmau5 - Ban Hammer (cover of "Crockett's Theme" by Jan Hammer)
    
28. Deadmau5 - Satrn
    
29. Deadmau5 - Coasted
    
30. Deadmau5 Ft. Chris James - The Veldt
    
31. Deadmau5 Ft. Chris James - The Veldt (Eric Prydz Edit)
    
32. Deadmau5 Ft. Chris James - The Veldt (Tommy Trash Remix)
    
33. Deadmau5 - Strobe
    
34. Deadmau5 - Speed, Violence, Momentum
    
35. Deadmau5 - Nosedive
    

Encore:

1. Deadmau5 Ft. SOFI - Sofi Needs A Ladder (Legend Of Zelda Intro Edit) [Featuring live vocals from SOFI]
   
2. Deadmau5 - Arguru (2019 Remaster)
   
3. Deadmau5 Ft. Rob Swire - Monophobia
   
4. Deadmau5 Ft. Kiesza - Bridged By A Light Wave
   

BONUS:

Here's a list of most of the Cube V3 "fun facts" shown on the cube before the show!

Tulsa's event list.

Wednesday, Feb 26th

• ♪ Brown Bag It: Donald Ryan (Tulsa Performing Art Center - Tulsa) Start Time: 12:10pm The Brown Bag It free noontime concert series at the Tulsa Performing Arts Center happens the first Wednesday of the month. The series features some of Oklahoma's finest professional musicians performing in the PAC's Westby Pavilion. A commanding and dynamic pianist, Donald Ryan has been called "a music kaleidoscope, sparkling at everything he…
• Build a Reader Storytime: Preschool (Owasso Library - Owasso) Start Time: 10:00am The best in children's literature, songs, games, finger plays, rhymes and other reading-related activities are shared with your preschooler. For ages 3-5.
• ♪ Chris Knight (Mercury Lounge - Tulsa) Start Time: 8:00pm CHRIS KNIGHT Almost Daylight "It's hard to know how people are gonna react," Chris Knight says of Almost Daylight , his ninth album and first new recording in over seven years. "I've written songs about a lot of different things going all the way back to my first record, and some folks still think ‘somebody kills somebody' is all I write…
• Dog Play Wednesday presented by AARP Oklahoma (Gathering Place - Tulsa) Start Time: 9:00am Bark your calendars! All day, every Wednesday. But that’s not all! Once a month, Gathering Place will have a special event made just for you and your pup. Keep checking our events schedule to see Pup-coming activities you won’t want to miss. Our tails are wagging just thinking about it! Please note, all dogs must be on a leash. Dogs are not…
• 🎓 Introduction to Facebook and Social Media (Martin Regional Library - Tulsa) Start Time: 2:00pm Join us for a basic introduction to Facebook. For adults.
• 🍴 Ladies Night* with Janet Rutland (Oklahoma Jazz Hall of Fame - Tulsa) Start Time: 8:00pm DUET LADIES NIGHT TICKETING INSTRUCTIONS Duet Jazz offer a free ladies night the last Wednesday of every month. Ladies are free and are treated to a free glass of champagne. Gentleman are $10.00 When you get to the Purchase Ticket page here . it will say general admission ticket. Directly above it, click the blue- hyperlink that says PROMO CODE.…
• ♪ Lee Roy Parnell (Hard Rock Hotel & Casino Tulsa - Catoosa) Start Time: 8:00pm
• ♪ Live on the Patio: Bandelier (Mother Road Market - Tulsa) Start Time: 6:00pm Live on the patio: Bandelier! Bandelier formed in the summer of 2010 in a warehouse in downtown Tulsa. Frontman Ryan Allen, originally hailing from Texas, spent a lifetime exploring the vast roots of American music eventually turning the pianist and composer into a full-fledged songwriter. Today, the band's music can be traced back to those same…
• Local Cheese Sampling (Mother Road Market - Tulsa) Start Time: 6:00pm Join us for Foodie Flight Wednesday at the K66 General Store at Mother Road Market for free samples of our original and hot pepper hellim grilling cheese, as well as the best fresh ricotta Oklahoma has to offer.
• ♪ NGHTMRE - The Portal Tour (Cain's Ballroom - Tulsa) Start Time: 7:00pm Cain's Ballroom welcomes NGHTMRE to Tulsa, OK on February 26, 2020 with Crankdat, WAVEDASH and Black A.M. YOU MUST HAVE A VALID iD TO ENTER! Advance Tier 1 - $20 + fees (limited quantity) Advance Tier 2 - $25 + fees Day of Show - $30 + fees Door - $30 Mezzanine (21+) - $40 + fees No re-entry! No smoking! No refunds! Support acts are subject to…
• 😂 Rob Little (Loony Bin - Tulsa) Thru Sat, Feb 29th
• The Secrets of Sauerkraut (Tulsa Garden Center - Tulsa) Start Time: 6:00pm RESCHEDULED FROM FEBRUARY 5. Lacey Wissen of Dale & Daughter will demonstrate how to prepare cabbage for sauerkraut and will show the tools used while presenting on the process and benefits of fermentation. The presentation will be followed by a flavor sampling, a Q&A, and participants will get to pack their own jars to take home and ferment…
• Swan Lake Gentlemen's Society Mid-week Show At The Blackbird (Blackbird On Pearl - Tulsa) Start Time: 7:30pm
• 🎓 Tom Skinner Science Project (The Colony - Tulsa) Start Time: 8:00pm Science Project 21+ • Tip the Band • Special Guests Weekly
• ♪ Track 5.: Lee Roy Parnell (Hard Rock Hotel & Casino Tulsa - Catoosa) Start Time: 8:00pm Among the elite few who can be identified as a triple threat, multiple Grammy Award nominee Lee Roy Parnell established his career through his impressive guitar offerings, smooth, soul-drenched voice and top-shelf songwriting skills. He heads to Track 5. on Feb. 26 at 8 p.m.
• Travels With Tulsans: Antarctica by Way of Argentina (Tulsa Central Library - Zink Study Room - Tulsa) Start Time: 12:10pm Take a trip with us and enjoy travelogues from fascinating locales both near and far.

Thursday, Feb 27th

• ♪ Caleb Fellenstein (Hard Rock Hotel & Casino Tulsa - Catoosa) Start Time: 4:00pm
• Daniel Chesser (The Hunt Club - Tulsa)
• ♪ The Dean DeMerritt Trio (Oklahoma Jazz Hall of Fame - Tulsa) Start Time: 8:00pm Dean DeMerritt with his Jazz trio at Duet! Purchase tickets here.
• ♪ DJ Queen Jessen (Hard Rock Hotel & Casino Tulsa - Catoosa) Start Time: 5:00pm
• ♪ DJ Whit (Hard Rock Hotel & Casino Tulsa - Catoosa) Start Time: 7:00pm
• ♪ Dueling Pianos (Hyatt Regency Hotel - Tulsa)
• Footloose (Broken Arrow Performing Arts Center - Broken Arrow) Day 1 of 2 Start Time: 7:30pm BAHS Drama presents "Footloose" Feb 27 - March 1! Tickets are on sale now. And the best part is you can buy tickets online at https://www.showtix4u.com/events/16313. Limited number of reserved seating available. Buy your tickets today! For more information call our box office at 918-259-5778
• ♪ The Freshmen (Hard Rock Hotel & Casino Tulsa - Catoosa) Start Time: 7:00pm
• 🎭 Howard Jones Acoustic Trio (The Vanguard - Tulsa) Start Time: 8:00pm
• Play in the Fantasy Realm: Imaginary Friends (Oklahoma Center for the Humanities - Tulsa) Start Time: 7:00pm Play in the Fantasy Realm: Young Children's Relationships with Imaginary Companions Join us for an evening with Tracy Gleason, a developmental psychologist studying relationships, real and imagined, with a focus on young children's imaginary companions. Dr. Gleason will talk about the ways in which children interact with imaginary friends and…
• 😂 Rob Little (Loony Bin - Tulsa) Thru Sat, Feb 29th
• ♪ Running On Empty (Hard Rock Hotel & Casino Tulsa - Catoosa) Start Time: 7:00pm
• Story Time (Gathering Place - Tulsa) Start Time: 4:00pm Fall in love with the magic found in children's books! Join us every Thursday at 4 p.m. and every Saturday at 9:30 a.m. in ONEOK Boathouse for Story Time from guest readers.
  Guest Reader Schedule Saturday, Jan. 25th - Gathering Place Education Team
  February Guest Readers: Saturday, February 1 - Gathering Place Education Team Thursday,…
  
• ♪ TCC Music Department Concert (VanTrease PACE - Tulsa) Start Time: 7:00pm Tags: Concert Free Music Southeast Campus VanTrease PACE Share
  
• 🎭 William Shakespeare's A Midsummer Night's Dream (Chapman Theatre - Tulsa) Day 1 of 2 Start Time: 8:00pm Purchase tickets online at utulsa.edu/tutheatre Adults: $15 Seniors Citizens (55+): $8 Students not from TU: $8 High School Students: 1 free ticket with school ID, otherwise $8 TU Faculty/Staff: $6 TU Students: Free opening night, otherwise $6
  

Friday, Feb 28th

• 70s/80s Throwback Night (Dennis R Neill Equality Center - Tulsa) Start Time: 6:30pm Your favorite gay disco is back open. Its time to have a ball. We have so much to learn about our history and such an exciting way to interact with it at OKEQ's Throwback Night: 70s/80s Edition. Join us for this FREE, all ages event with specialty drinks and cocktails, curated music, and all sorts of historical documents from Oklahoma's LGBTQ+…
• ♪ Aaron Lewis-Acoustic Songs & Stories (Brady Theater - Tulsa) Start Time: 8:00pm Aaron Lewis - Acoustic Songs & Stories 7pm Doors / 8pm Show On Sale Fri 11/1 10am
• ♪ Andrew Harmon (Hard Rock Hotel & Casino Tulsa - Catoosa) Start Time: 5:30pm
• ♪ Asphalt Cowboys (Hard Rock Hotel & Casino Tulsa - Catoosa) Start Time: 8:00pm
• Brandon Clark (The Hunt Club - Tulsa)
• ♪ DJ 2 Legit (Hard Rock Hotel & Casino Tulsa - Catoosa) Start Time: 6:30pm
• ♪ DJ Demko (Hard Rock Hotel & Casino Tulsa - Catoosa) Start Time: 6:00pm
• ♪ DJ Mib (Hard Rock Hotel & Casino Tulsa - Catoosa) Start Time: 7:00pm
• Footloose (Broken Arrow Performing Arts Center - Broken Arrow) Day 2 of 2 Start Time: 7:30pm BAHS Drama presents "Footloose" Feb 27 - March 1! Tickets are on sale now. And the best part is you can buy tickets online at https://www.showtix4u.com/events/16313. Limited number of reserved seating available. Buy your tickets today! For more information call our box office at 918-259-5778
• 🍴 Gilcrease After Hours: Memories & Inspiration (FREE Admission) (The Gilcrease Museum - Tulsa) Start Time: 7:00pm Join us for an evening of cocktails and culture in celebration of our exhibition MEMORIES & INSPIRATION: THE KERRY AND C. BETTY DAVIS COLLECTION OF AFRICAN AMERICAN ART. Admission is FREE! Schedule and details to come. This program is funded in part by Oklahoma Humanities (OH) and the National Endowment for the Humanities (NEH). Any views,…
• 🎓 Jake Hertzog Trio (Oklahoma Jazz Hall of Fame - Tulsa) Start Time: 8:00pm Jake Hertzog is a critically acclaimed guitarist, composer and educator whose career to-date has spanned nine albums as bandleader across jazz, rock and classical new music styles. He has toured throughout the U.S., Europe, Latin America, the Middle East and India and performed and recorded with a diverse cadre of artists including Randy…
• Long Live Vaporwave with BabyBlue (Bar 46 - Tulsa) Start Time: 9:30pm
• Madama Butterfly (Tulsa Performing Art Center - Tulsa) Thru Sun, Mar 1st Giacomo Puccini’s beloved "Madama Butterfly" comes to Tulsa during the Tulsa Opera's 2019-2020 season.…
• 🎓 Memory Gala 2020 (Cox Business Center - Tulsa) Start Time: 5:30pm Alzheimer’s Association Tulsa presents "Memory Gala" to celebrate the impact and opportunity this milestone presents with a night centered around the Alzheimer's Association's goal to prevent and effectively treat Alzheimer’s disease and other dementias by 2025.
• ♪ Nightingale - EP Release Show (The Vanguard - Tulsa) Start Time: 7:30pm
• 🏆 Oral Roberts vs. Incarnate Word (Mabee Center - Tulsa) Start Time: 3:00pm Oral Roberts Golden Eagles vs. Incarnate Word Cardinals First pitch is scheduled for 3:00 p.m. All tickets are buy one get one free. Tickets available online at MabeeCenter.com, over-the-phone at 918-495-6000, or in-person at the Mabee Center Ticket Office.
• 😂 Rob Little (Loony Bin - Tulsa) 1 day left
• Steller Ascent (The Shrine - Tulsa) Start Time: 8:00pm
• Tanner Miller & The Contraband (The Colony - Tulsa) Start Time: 10:00pm
• 🍴 Teacher Happy Hour (Philbrook Downtown - Tulsa) Start Time: 6:00pm Oklahoma teachers are invited to drop in for a happy hour before our Women Who Changed Art (And a BIG Reveal!) event (free for Members, ticket required). Come meet up with other area teachers, talk shop, or just relax and grab a drink. Enjoy food, a cash bar, art, the incomparable Philbrook gardens, and best of all, other teachers. FREE for…
• 🍴 Vinyl Happy Hour (The Colony - Tulsa) Start Time: 4:00pm Bring your favorite vinyl to spin on our house sound system
• ♪ Weekend All Stars (Hard Rock Hotel & Casino Tulsa - Catoosa) Start Time: 9:00pm
• 🎭 William Shakespeare's A Midsummer Night's Dream (Chapman Theatre - Tulsa) Day 2 of 2 Start Time: 8:00pm Purchase tickets online at utulsa.edu/tutheatre Adults: $15 Seniors Citizens (55+): $8 Students not from TU: $8 High School Students: 1 free ticket with school ID, otherwise $8 TU Faculty/Staff: $6 TU Students: Free opening night, otherwise $6
• 🎨 Women Who Changed Art (And a BIG Reveal!) (Philbrook Downtown - Tulsa) Start Time: 6:30pm Women have made major contributions to the history of art, and yet are rarely in the spotlight. Join Bridget Quinn (author of "Broad Strokes: 15 Women Who Made Art and Made History") and Philbrook curators as they discuss the significant impact of women artists throughout history and unveil new additions to Philbrook’s collection by women…

Saturday, Feb 29th

• Madama Butterfly (Tulsa Performing Art Center - Tulsa) 1 day left Giacomo Puccini’s beloved "Madama Butterfly" comes to Tulsa during the Tulsa Opera's 2019-2020 season.…
• 😂 Rob Little (Loony Bin - Tulsa) Last Day
• Trolls LIVE! (BOK Center - Tulsa) Day 1 of 2 Start Time: 10:00am

Sunday, Mar 1st

• 😂 Josh And Chuck After Dark (Loony Bin - Tulsa)
• Madama Butterfly (Tulsa Performing Art Center - Tulsa) Last Day Giacomo Puccini’s beloved "Madama Butterfly" comes to Tulsa during the Tulsa Opera's 2019-2020 season.…
• Trolls LIVE! (BOK Center - Tulsa) Day 2 of 2 Start Time: 10:00am

Monday, Mar 2nd

I was unable to find any published events for Mar 2nd.

Tuesday, Mar 3rd

• 🏆 Tulsa Oilers vs. Allen Americans (BOK Center - Tulsa) Start Time: 7:05pm

See Also

• OK Gamers
• Techlahoma
• Tulsa Meetup Groups
• Tulsa Library Events

Saturday, December 18th
I wake up and my back is fucking killing me. Megan closed the spa last night and she's quitting her (shitty) second job and her last day is Saturday so she's gone in early to get everything wrapped up and her exit interview. I decide to clean up my garage a bit and get some work done around the house. The morning starts off with some eggs and breakfast sausage with a tall glass of simply grapefruit. Life isn't great, but it could be a lot worse.
We are all having a little chat about life, weekends and women as I move charcoal and my dads tools around the garage when suddenly my good buddeh u/fluffy_butternut tells everyone that regular women are not damaged enough for me to enjoy. Not only is this HIGHLY insulting to me, but it reflects poorly on Megan as well.
rewind to several months before
Mrs. Fluffy emailed the whole reddit gang and told us we are invited to a surprise birthday party for the big guy. She gave us instructions/time/place, etc and everything. She did a TON of work to plan this and it shows. I was under the gun at the courthouse with a trial and I wasn't able to commit to the event and all of us have stuff going on so the odds of anyone being able to make it were not good. However, I kept her email, and her cell number on a burner.
cut to present
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cyLdtG7KZvw
Did he really go there? He really went there. It's fucking on like Donkey Kong. I pull out a burner and send a message to Mrs. Fluffy asking her if the plans are still the same. She tells me when he will be arriving at the venue and I tell her I'm gonna make a big fucking scene. She is ecstatic at this idea.
I grab my packed bag from the closet and jump in the F350. I grab two organic bean to bar 88% endangered species chocolate bars for Megan and I stop by her work. She's busy, so I leave the chocolate for her at her station. I give her co-worker a note to hand to her when she gets out.
"Dear Megan, out for revenge. Back tomorrow - Will."
I start driving to MSY and traffic down I-10 isn't bad for a saturday. I phone Delta on the way there and book tickets for the flight. The only thing available is MD88 service connecting in Laguardia. In First. Being no stranger to the slightly elevated service and highly elevated price business model, I book the flight. I'm a little early so I make my way to the nearly brand new Delta Sky Club at MSY. It's new, the gumbo is tasty, the wifi is fast. Life isn't bad. Until I get the phone call from Megan.
Me: Hi sweetie
Megan: what the fuck does "out for revenge mean?"
Me: It means I'm out for revenge. I gotta do some things.
Megan: What things? We're supposed to have dinner with my brother tomorrow night!
Me: Uh. It's a long story. How was your exit interview?
Megan: It was fine. I'm leaving early today.
Me: Did you go back to your station yet?
Megan: No
Me: You should stop there again before you leave.
Megan: Why?
The airport PA screeches boarding announcement for my flight.
Me: They're calling my flight. I gotta run.
Megan: Flight? What?
Me: Gotta hop. Buy potatoes. See you tomorrow night!
I hang up and hightail it for the gate. I pop in and see the pilots before we leave and ask them what are the odds we get 31 via the expressway today. He says he was just loading it into the box. I tell him the last time I did 31 via the expressway into LGA at the Delta Museum sim, it was not good. In fact it was the worst thing to hit new york since a bunch of muslims on a tuesday in September. He laughs.
The ride into LGA is smooth as the HMG STG delivery schedule. New York is WINDY as fuck today and bumpy. I peer out the window of the left side of the plane and I get a beautiful close up photo of the statue of liberty and Ellis island. Wait. We're supposed to get 31 via the expressway. We should be on the localizer for LGA runway 4. That puts us right over my aunts place in Bay Ridge looking at the Verazanno. We're not getting 31, they're probably going to take us up over central park, back over da bronx and then in via 22.
Sure enough, we land on 22 and I ask the pilots what happened and they said the winds shifted and they had to turn the airport around. Eh, no biggie. I've seen it once, I'll see it again. It's a great approach to fly and if you ever get to experience it, it's fucking magical.
We land at LGA a few minutes late and the weather is cold, crisp and windy. I have a short connection but I head to the LGA sky club in terminal D. Life is good. I crack the laptop and do some work and as I close the laptop as they call my flight I see the very beginnings of light snow. I'm from Louisiana. I've never seen snow before. This scares me. I walk to the gate and I board in group 1 and take my first class seat. The plane is half empty. I walk up and chat with the pilots and they tell me that with the snow we are going to deice with type 1 fluid and anti ice with type 4 fluid. We will be a little delayed. As I gaze out the window from my seat, it's snowing and blowing even more.
Ten minutes later, the boarding door closes and we start to push back. Conditions have worsened significantly. We can't see the next plane in front of us, things have turned into not quite whiteout but very concerning to this southern boy. The pilots tell us we are number 3 for the deicing truck and I gaze out onto the runway.
It's whiter than an Ohio MAGA rally.
Fuck me to tears.
We deice as I check the weather in Pittsburgh. Rain/Freezing rain/Snow/wintry mix. I've never driven in snow. Fuck. Pucker factor increasing. I pull out my burner and send a message to Mrs. Fluffy and tell her I'm at the deice pad and will be there soon. We have a bumpy ride all the way across Pennsylvania and land about 30 minutes late. Hertz has me in the presidents circle but there is not a single car with local plates.
I downgrade to a 2020 white Toyota Corolla since it's the only thing with PA plates on it and I hightail it to the venue. I talk to the waitstaff and tell them I'm crashing the party and ask them to get me a tray and a vest with a nametag. The staff is laughing their ass off at my idea. I message Mrs. Fluffy and she thinks the idea is HYSTERICAL. She can't wait. I tell her I'll be there at 645.
T minus 60 minutes until Fluffy Arrival
I've never been to this part of Pennsylvania. To be honest, I am a Philly guy. The people there are angry, drunken, profane and love cheese steaks. They're my kind of people. I've never been to a Sheetz or Primanti Brothers. However, fluffy tells me some stories about how he and his wife have a good time over at the meadows. I have NEVER been to a racino before, and ever since I was nearly arrested at Wynn Las Vegas - I've been a little scared. However, it's just down the road and as some of you know, I just came into a shit ton of money.
This is not going to end well.
I drive down interstate 79 and whip into the north parking garage at The Meadows.
My pre-packed bag has four days of clothes, underwear, socks and PJ's, two kruggerands and $10,000 in cash just in case i need to flee the country. I pull out the ten dimes and make my way into the racino. The Meadows is HUGE. I get past the security checkpoint and walk around and I don't see any table games. I see a large well appointed poker room and see two craps tables working at the other end of the hall. I have no idea what table limits or odds are.
I saunter up to the table.
Me: How's the temperature guys?
Degen1: Eh it's up and down.
Me: As long as it's not as cold as outside amirte?
Degen2: haha yeah yinz been outside today? freezing rain and that!
Me: I don't know these words but whatever.
The point is on 6.
I drop $10,000 on the table.
Me: Change only. Gimme 1 small and 9 thousands.
Pit Boss: do you have a players club card?
Me: never played here before, don't worry about it for now.
Pit Boss: Okay!
The dice come out, it hits jimmy hicks and the dealers pay out all the bets. I look at the table, the minimums are $5 and everyone has pass line and numbers. NOBODY has true odds. Fuck it. Time to show them how it's done.
I drop $10 on the pass line.
Dice are out. Point is four. I look up and down the table and nobody is making odds bets. I look down at my rack and drop $100 behind my bet.
Dice come out. Six hard.
Me: Hey pit boss! How much can I put behind the line?
Pit Boss: We'll let you go to 10x, so we can take $100 on your pass line. It looks like you got $100 there but we'd count it out and if you were over we'll give you the extra back.
Me: solid, thanks!
I look down at my watch. Fluffy is due to arrive at 1900hrs. I told Mrs. I would be there at 1845. It's 15 minutes to drive from the garage to the party which means I need to be on the highway at 1830 which means I need to be out of the casino and cashed out and walking to the garage by 1825. She sends me a message asking me where I'm at. I tell her I'm at the meadows and.....fuck it's 1821.
Fuck it. Go big or go home.
I take my pass line up to $500 and shove $5000 behind the line. Everyone at the table is looking at me funny. I give $2400 to the dealers and tell them to split me the 6/8.
Pit Boss: are you SURE you don't want a players club card?
Me: no time! throw them bones!
The whip slides the dice over to the fella next to me. He throws.
Dealer: Four hard, four the hard way, four.
Everyone at the table is looking at me funny. My $500 pass line bet has paid even money. The $5000 behind the line pays true odds on a 4, at 2:1. I look down at my watch. 1829. The dealers are stacking and distributing chips with a fervor.
Me: Take down my 6/8 and color me up.
Dealer: You got it boss!
As they color up my chips, I tell Mrs. fluffy I just won a ton of money at the meadows and I'm cashing out now. I take a $100 chip, hold it up and ask if the dealers want to play it or drop it
Dealer: It's up to you man, we don't mind.
I plant the chip down on the pass line and tell them put half on the pass line ferda boys, drop the other half. They all LITERALLY clap and thank me.
Me: One more thing, where's the cashier?
They point me to the cage with the aplomb of a new airport ramper. I leave the casino with a giant wad of cash bulging in my jeans. There's no line and they count out all my cash quickly. I look down at my watch as she's counting out the last of the small bills. 1835.
Fuck. I'm going to be late. I hate being late. I jog out to the north garage and hightail it back up interstate 79.
I have never driven in snow, at night, or for that matter driven in Pennsylvania before until now. It's snowing, it's dark, the speed limit is 55 and I am the SLOWEST guy in the right lane at 80 and people are passing me going WTF ARE YOU DOING GET OFF THE ROAD judging by the horns and the flashing headlights. I am HAULING ass back up to the venue and I park the Toyota in a handicapped spot as I race into the venue. I find Harriet, the party planner she hands me a vest with a nametag.
My transition from Will the gun dealer to Mario the waiter will completed as soon as he arrives. I get fluffy's favorite drink and a plate of some food set up on a tray and I hide in the back waiting for his arrival. Here's a photo. https://imgur.com/yZP2FuI
As if it were choreographed to the minute, Mrs. Fluffy walks him in the front door at 7PM to a room full of people as a birthday surprise. He had not seen it coming. He begins making the rounds seeing everyone and saying hello. It's a big party so it takes some time. I hang back for a few minutes and let him do his thing and I give my phone to one of his friends and tell them to get this next part on video as I put on the vest and adjust the nametag.
Friendo: Sure thing "mario"
Me: shut up and just do some good camera work!
I take the tray of beverage and minature charcuterie plate over to fluffy as he's greeting the party guests and sneak up behind him. He's taking his grand old time working the room. In my best italian Pittsburgh native accent I can muster, I'm holding the tray and I walk in front of him and put on a great big smile.
Me: Can I get yinz something to drink? Or some charcuterie and that?
Fluffy: .......
(I now feign anger)
Me: OR IS THIS FOOD AND BEVERAGE NOT DAMAGED ENOUGH FOR YOUR LIKING?!?!?!??!?!?! YOU FAT DIABETIC OLD FUCK!
Fluffy: What.....are you.........doing here?
Me: Mrs told us about it and I figured I should give you a hard time after your comments this morning. Would you like some food? You know, airplane noises make the food taste better. Or are you a little too old for that? Lets give it a try!
(I grab a carrot stick and fly it into his face by making very loud airplane noises in a ballroom full of fluffy's closest friends and family making a gigantic scene with people wondering is this a joke or what horrors are about to come next. No, this is not a joke, this really happened. Ask anyone who was there.)
Fluffy: I'm good thanks
Me: you sure? (more airplane noises followed by a carrot slice raping his mouth)
Fluffy is shocked and awed. I tell him to go work the room and to have a happy birthday party. There's an open bar and I help myself to a double ginger ale, neat.
I find some millennials and we chat about Hawaiian shirts and stuff and they think my comedy is HILARIOUS. Unlike most of reddit. Fluffy saunters over and we chat some more and he's wondering WTF. I told him the wife planned it all months in advance.
Fluffy: You know u/xxxwirtydhorexxx is here.
Me: That's really funny.
Fluffy: No, he's really here.
Me: Bullshit. Then where is he?
Fluffy: He's right in front of you, 12 o'clock.
I don't see him. Then I look down and there's a guy in a boonie hat. I didn't recognize him without the dress.
Me: Oh dear god. He's really here isn't he?
Wirty gets up and walks over and he's like HI! I THOUGHT IT WAS YOU!
We have a bunch of really really awkward conversation that involves him inviting me to sit next to him and me running over to Mrs. Fluffy asking her to save me from wirty. She finds a spot at her table by her kids for me.
I forget his present, even though his wife said no presents and there's a table full of booze, scratchers, and gun stuff. I drive back up to the hotel to grab it and give it to him. He has no idea what it is. You all should ask him about it. I give it to him and Wirty starts complaining about normies.
Fluffy: Where are you staying?
Me: The Hilton just down the street
Fluffy: Oh, the one on the top of the hill?
Me: That's why it's the HILL-ton.
Everyone groans. Me and wirty talk and he weirds me out and demands to stand next to me in the group photo. I tell more jokes and the millenial group loves me. We close the place down and head back to fluffy's hotel.
BOY HOWDY LET ME TELL YOU.........if you thought MY stories were longwinded and pointless you have not met some of fluffy's friends! His local raconteur buddy was telling us at 145AM his story about being fucked by the Virginia state police for speeding. Yeah. I dump him off at his hotel and I head back up to my room. It's 3AM by the time I shower and sleep.
SUNDAY JANUARY 19TH 2020
My alarm wakes me up at 9AM. My back is killing me. My head is pounding. It's 21 degrees outside. Fuck this noise. I go back to sleep.
The hotel phone rings.
Me: Go for Hayden
Operator: I have a fluffy butternut on the phone for you.
Me: Go ahead and connect us
Operator: Thank you
(sound of dial tone)
I'm not making this up. I grab my phone and call fluffy and we have brunch at the meadows with the mrs. It's fun, we talk guns, life, liberty and the pursuit of extra sides of marinara.
I hang out with them at the slot machines until it's time to head to the airport. I gas up at the sheetz next to the racetrack and I fly back home in coach since my status on delta is radioactive dirt. The incoming flight is late from Atlanta which means we leave late for Atlanta and i get back home 2.5 hours later than I expected.
Laundry is running and I am unpacking as Megan walks in the door.
Me: Hi!
Megan: Hi. Back from revenge so soon?
Me: Yeah. I'm actually late. How was dinner with your brother?
Megan: Good. He took me to olive garden. So tell me what was so important you had to go out for revenge and come back the next day?
(I tell her the story)
Megan: Wait a minute. Your friend insulted you as a joke, so you bought a last minute first class ticket to new york and pennsylvania to fly to his surprise birthday party to yell at him in person, in january in 21 degree weather?
Me: Yeah.
Megan: Why would you do that?
Me: Well he said that you're damaged goods. He wasn't insulting me, he was insulting you. I didn't like that.
Megan: You cannot be serious.
Me: I am serious.
Megan: and don't call you Shirley?
Me: You're weird.
Megan: I'm not the one that just flew across the country to go "out for revenge", and I'm the weird one?
Me: (goofy smile)
Megan: (goofy laughter)
Have a lovely holiday weekend everyone!